Ever since I was a little girl I dreamed that one day I'd find my Prince Charming and he'd sweep me off my feet leading to our inevitable happily ever after. Unfortunately, growing up in the generation I find myself a part of has led me to believe that this so-called "love" is only a figure of my imagination.
Looking at my parent's relationship and hearing their love story has made me grow resentful towards our so-called "hook-up culture." The idea that one person can belong to multiple people at once is something I will never be able to comprehend. However, I feel inclined to do the same because otherwise I might be perceived as desperate or crazy.
Isn't that the crazy part, though? That I can be made to feel insane for wanting to be with one person, and just one person, and for them to want the same from me? This whole concept doesn't sit right with me. I don't understand how we went from the traditional dates and small, but meaningful gestures to one-night-stands and waiting for a text or call that will most likely never come. What is even appealing about that? I don't know why someone would rather deal with the stress, anxiety and overthinking than having something stable and meaningful.
A part of it is our generation seems to be fearful of feeling anything genuine. We have let ourselves become consumed with the fear of not being enough or being rejected and let it interfere with how we relate with one another. Don't get me wrong, I believe there are a few souls out there that haven't let it get the best of them but finding those people is almost impossible.
We seem to be so afraid of showing affection and emotions because we don't know what the outcome could be. So, instead we decide to keep our feelings bottled up and allow ourselves to not only begin a vicious of cycle of "I hurt you, you hurt me," but also end up losing sight of what love is in the process.
Social media has contributed to this immensely. Subtweets and slightly passive aggressive Instagrams have become the way we express emotion. And god forbid the person we are directing it to doesn't get the message. Dating apps like Tinder have made the whole process easier. We don't have to ever feel lonely or empty if there's always someone who's willing to meet up for a one time hook up right?
Wrong. I can only speak for myself when I say this makes me feel emptier and lonelier than before. It's like we are all in on this secret game. The only thing is there's no real winners here. We're all losing constantly because we waste so much time playing instead of being open and honest about what we feel or want.
I'd be a hypocrite if I said I wasn't a part of this too. I am, but it's not something I agree with. I genuinely hope that we are able to outgrow this phase as a society by the time I have children because I don't want them to experience the constant struggle I know my friends and I feel.
