To the girl who skipped the party stage: I get you.

To the girl who didn’t skip the party stage: I get you.

You both make valid arguments defending your choices. But here’s the thing: there shouldn’t be a reason to defend them in the first place. Instead, we need to take steps to understand each argument and the individual it’s stemming from rather than attack everyone who engages in a different lifestyle.

To the girl who skipped the party stage: I get you. I skipped it too. For the remainder of my life, I will continue to skip it. I have no desire whatsoever to go out to a party on a Friday or Saturday or Tuesday or whatever-day night and live it up. Because, to me, that’s not living it up. It’s not a situation I particularly like or feel comfortable in.

To the girl who didn’t skip the party stage: I get you. Socializing is great. Making friends is great. Having fun is great. I respect you. I respect your decisions. I understand why it is you like to go out on Friday nights and I will completely stand by your decision and right to do so.

To the girl who skipped the party stage: I get you. Too many times, I have been questioned incessantly on why I don’t drink. Too many times, I’ve been told by the people I went out to socialize with that they can’t talk to me because I’m not drunk and tomorrow I’ll remember everything they said. Too many times, I’ve had drinks shoved in my face by people way too concerned with whether or not I partake. I get it. I’ve been there. Your opinions and feelings are valid.

To the girl who didn’t skip the party stage: I get you. I know society’s stereotypes of a party girl. Hell, I know society’s stereotypes of a girl. We can’t do anything without being judged for it. I hate that you’re judged for your decisions. I do. I hate it. It’s not fair to you. You should be able to do whatever you please without other people scrutinizing your every move (I mean, so long as "whatever you please" isn't murder, because then, I can't really support you there). I will not judge you. It is against everything I believe in to judge you for doing what makes you happy.

But, I also ask you then not to judge my decisions. Because I hate when they’re judged as well. My ideal Friday night is staying in watching Netflix with my boyfriend or climbing into my roommate/best friend’s bed so we can eat a quart of ice cream and talk about life. I don’t feel like I’m missing out by not going out. I don’t feel like I need to put myself in uncomfortable situations simply to grow as a person. Life puts me in enough uncomfortable situations without me going out of my way to add to it.

Please don’t judge me, and I won’t judge you. Go out, enjoy yourself, live your life. Have a one night stand or don’t have a one night stand. Get drunk or don’t. It’s your body, your life and your decision. I will firmly support that and I will never actively try and make you feel like a lesser human being because of what you choose to do.

What I do with my Friday nights has literally no effect on you. What you do with your Friday nights has literally no effect on me. So why do we care? Why should we try and tell each other which decision is the right decision? To me, I’m living my life to the fullest. To you, you’re living your life to the fullest. Do the two really have to be mutually exclusive?