Oh where, oh where could flight 370 be?
After the Malaysian aircraft went missing, authorities have been unable to give concerned citizens answers regarding the plane's whereabouts. In this article, I attempt to provide some of these answers (as well as a little comic relief).

The tragedy of the missing aircraft of Flight 370 is one that has caused paranoia and fear among the citizens of the world. The Malaysian airliner went missing over two weeks ago, and, since then, searches for the aircraft or signs of its pieces have been underway with little to no luck in finding it.

Debates have ensued in Western media about the fate of the plane. Some wonder if it is now just debris from the aircraft’s possible destruction, and others wonder if the plane is being hidden in a remote location where its awaiting its use as a vehicle for some sort of terrorist act. Sadly, no option that the media has presented is one that presents a happy ending for all parties involved. Until the aircraft is discovered, Americans are – and should continue – sending sympathy and prayers to the plane’s passengers and their loved ones.

In order go one step further, and in hopes of lightening the mood a little bit, I began a sort of comical think-tank, brainstorming some places that could possibly be harboring the missing plane. What I came up with is a list of five places, some of which are fictional, others that are very real, but also very impossible to search. All, however, are places that I believe Flight 370 may have ended up.

The Bermuda Triangle: With no evidence of a crash, and no knowledge about its whereabouts, it is becoming more and more likely that the plane is in a parallel universe or a galaxy far, far away. At one point in the search, this was actually suggested as a reason for the mystery of the vanishing plane. But if we are being honest, Morgan Freeman couldn't make such a news story sound convincing.

Neverland: After it was reported that the aircraft was taken above 40,000 feet, I realized that the aircraft was most likely headed for Neverland. Just like Peter Pan says, “second star to the right, and straight on till morning.” The real question remains: how will Captain Hook use the plane to finally off Peter Pan?

Area 51: After watching the countless late night specials and documentaries on what really lies beyond the gates of Area 51, the truth is I, like all other viewers, still don't have the slightest clue what the hell goes on in this place. Yet I am still convinced that the aircraft is being hidden at this mysterious site. If they have a garage big enough to hold UFOs, why not an airplane?

Sarah Palin’s hair: Palin is practically the Amy Winehouse of American politics; however, unlike Gretchen Wieners, Sarah Palin’s hair is not full of secrets. Anyone who has seen her reality show will know that it is, most likely, full of hot air or knock-knock jokes. Also, Alaska is the perfect place to hide this plane because, let’s face it, who’s really checking up on them?

Kuala Lumpur International Airport: My final and most plausible theory is that the aircraft never really took off. Why would they report a missing aircraft that wasn't really missing? What about the passengers? I don't have a damn clue. It could have been to scare another country or the scheme could have been part of a bigger political happening. The truth is that if we never found out what happened to the plane, it would just be another incidence of political scandal on top of the thousands before that we never heard about.

On a more serious note, every day it becomes more and more likely that the Malaysian aircraft will never be found. Like the majority of the world, I am anxious to discover the location of the missing plane and I remain hopeful that its disappearance will not impact global safety and that its passengers and crew are alive and well.