“When God closes a door, he opens a window.”

Right?

Except, what about when He doesn’t? What about the times that He pulls your heart and your mind in a 180 and you feel for a fact that you aren’t supposed to do something anymore—But doesn’t show you what you’re supposed to do.

I’ve been there. I am there. And (as I keep telling myself) it’s okay. Sometimes God keeps us in the dark and in the unknown so that we become desperate for Him and His comfort. I can tell you I have. I don’t have my life plan to fall back on anymore. I have always been the person with everything mapped out. With no plan in place, sometimes I feel like I’m in a tailspin and the only thing I can reach out and grab is God.

I’ve been in this place for almost a year now, and I’m still standing. I’m still pursuing a doctorate degree. I’m still seeking God in all things. I’m still doing all I can to make myself a better person. I may have no clue what I’m going to do with the skills I’m developing along the way, but I know that God knows.

It’s okay to not know what the future holds, so long as you know who holds the future. Cheesy, I know, but it’s incredibly true. God has a plan for each and every one of us, so at the end of the day all those plans I had were useless anyway. Maybe He has me in a place without a plan so that I can learn to be flexible. Maybe I need to learn to trust Him more.

God doesn’t put us somewhere we can’t learn. So, if you’re locked in a room with a shut door and you’ve yet to see a window, don’t feel alone. God is in the locked room with you. He is there to comfort you and hold your hand. And, I have to trust, that when I’m ready He will spring open a window I never could have even imagined.

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. Isa. 55:9