So, you feel like the grass is greener on the other side. The truth is: you are right. The grass is always greener. Always. Do you know why? Because you haven’t been to the other side yet.
You haven’t transferred schools to realize that you’re going to experience the same loneliness somewhere else. You haven’t dated that girl’s “perfect” boyfriend to recognize that they are still two normal, broken people. You haven’t lived her life to understand that she has the same insecurities you do. You haven’t accepted a bid from another sorority to realize you would have had a similar experience with a different set of girls. You haven’t seen your life 20 years down the road to realize that God needed your family to look that way so that you could become who you need to be. You haven’t met the man of your dreams to realize you needed to be single and find yourself individually for the 2 years leading up to him.
I could go on and on. Insert your own comparison game here: You haven’t _________ to realize _________. We are all guilty of it, but try and think about what the “to realize” part would be in your own life. What would you realize if your comparison dream actually came true?
Here are some things I have learned and continue to learn:
1. Comparison is the thief of joy. If you find yourself constantly lining up your life to the life of someone else, you are driving yourself down a long road of discontentment. Every time you compare yourself to someone else, you are robbing yourself of joy.
2. Comparison keeps you from being present. It is the easiest way for you to get side-tracked and miss out on everything right in front of you. When you are too focused on what you would rather be doing or where you would rather be, you are ignoring the hidden blessings all around you.
3. Comparison pulls you away from reality. When you compare, you begin focusing more on feelings and you begin dwelling too long on what life would be like if _______, instead of dwelling on what life is.
4. Comparison keeps you thinking in “extremes.” One thing my dad always tells me is, “Nothing is ever as bad as it seems and nothing is ever as good as it seems.” In other words, comparison is all about feelings. You feel like something would significantly improve in your life if you just had this one thing different. Truth is, it probably isn’t as good as it seems. You just feel that way. And what you have probably isn’t as bad as it seems. You just feel that way.
Lastly, getting rid of comparison is about getting a hold of your feelings. It’s about being present and being thankful for the life you are currently living, instead of constantly trying to change or improve it. So, yes, the grass is greener on the other side… until you get there and realize there's always another side.
