I'm in college, and I complain a lot. I hope to overcome this annoying trait and just accept the fact that I'm here to better my education and myself, hopefully. I've payed attention to the culture that I live in nowadays, and I've noticed something. We are a pretty negative bunch of people, and I am talking to myself. There have been times where I felt that if I didn't have something negative to say about anything, then I wouldn't be accepted. It sounds crazy, but it's true. Think about it. How do you interact with people on a moment to moment basis? I wonder why we fill our conversations with negativity and pessimism. Here's why I think we lean more towards the glass half-empty mentality:
1. It's Funny
Snapchat is pretty cool. I enjoy posting random pictures of my day on my story and using the filters to make my face really fat. It's funny. I'm not about to bash Snapchat, because Snapchat didn't do anything, but we love using other people as a tool to ridicule and mock. Hold the phone. You're probably thinking "she's really petty," but it's also petty to film yourself driving down the road and getting "mad" at traffic and pretend to have uncontrollable road-rage. It's funny. It's cool to point out the crazy things that happen to us. Can it be healthy and all in good fun? Yeah, it can, but it isn't very cute for people to be mad and tough all the time, which brings me to my next point. Think about it. Are we really mad? If we are, then is it worth it to vent about it? If not, then...you get my point.
2. Insecurity
Sometimes I just have no idea what to say to people, especially if I don't know them. We just want to fit in. If we get uncomfortable, it's cool to just start naming off the things we hate about the world to have something in common. We will pull anything out of the air to start a conversation. I sadly do it all the time. If we are embarrassed about how passionate we are about something, and if other people don't like it, we accommodate for them in order to make them comfortable, and put ourselves down so we don't look stupid. We have nothing better to say than to bash ourselves or that prof that gives too much homework. Like I mentioned before, it is never a bad thing to be obvious, and I am not insinuating that we ought to be fake about how we're feeling, but don't rely on other people's validation and conversation to manufacture a negative attitude in you.
3. We Have Our Guard Up
We are afraid of being "shown up" by anyone, so we stay on guard at all times and have sarcastic remarks as our ammo and our mouths as our gun. We don't want to look stupid, so we make sure that if we get called out, we have something to sling back.
4. We Just Want To Relate
This ties in perfect with point 2. We just want to be on the same wavelength as other people and know that we aren't alone. We just want to have something in common, so we decide to hate the same things. Why not love the same things (unless those things include being hateful)? Why do we find it funny when someone has a bad temper and has something to say about everything? Why do we find it necessary to roll our eyes when we walk in a room before we even say a word? Because we want to relate. I hope we can find better things to laugh over.
One wise friend and mentor told me once that you are never in the wrong if you are positive. People will try to make you look dumb and knock your feet out from under you. You can take the high road.You have that option. Let's turn this thing around.
Best,
Hope