It's a sad world we live in when people will continue to pursue people even after the person has expressed obvious disinterest. Long gone are the days where "No thank you" or "I'm not interested" will deter someone. Honestly, my go to is "I have a fiance" because let's be real, men tend to usually respect other men more than the woman's choice. (Some, not all! Kudos to all the amazing guys out there!)
But instead of using the phrase "I have a boyfriend" here are some new fresh and fun ways that might get guys to listen!
1. "I'm pregnant."
Unless you've encountered men with pregnancy fetishes, this will usually work and is pretty easy.
2. "Can my 7 children join us on the date?"
If this doesn't make the man run for the hills then you have found a winner!
*I love children and love people with children, I do not see children as a "deal breaker" in my own personal opinion*
3. "Sure! I have some time to kill while my ex is in prison!"
This should be pretty scary.
4. "I'd be delighted! Just got my STD testing back and I'm clear for now!"
Bonus points if you have fake papers to throw at him.
5. Just start to cry.
Guys hate crying.
6. "Yeah of course! But first, can you pee in this cup for me?"
Don't say why. Let his mind wander.
7. Practice this video from internet sensation Jenna Marbles (NSFW)
8. Ask them first who they're voting for
This is just uncomfortable in any situation.
9. Pretend to be any type of animal.
Definite bonus points if the animal you pretend to be is a velociraptor.
10. "I'm 15."
If he still goes for it, call the police.
In all seriousness, you shouldn't have to drop these lines. A simple "No thank you" should work. This also works on women. Women aren't excluded from this. You shouldn't have to use any excuse other than "No." But we all know this could just be women playing hard to get, and the last thing we need is for more people to suffer at the hands of someone like Brock Turner.
For real. Let's all be decent human beings and respect each other. There are all kinds of fish in the sea. Don't keep going after one that swims deeper and deeper to get away from you.
How about you? Drop your funniest "I'm not interested" alternatives so we can all get a good laugh!
