A lot of you probably went home for the long Columbus day weekend; I had been looking forward to my first time coming home since the day I left. One extra day with no classes gives plenty of reason to go home for. Sleeping in your own bed, home-cooked meals and visiting family and friends are obvious perks of coming home, but there’s something bittersweet about returning to the place you grew up as a guest. What used to be comfortable isn’t yours anymore, life has been going on in the same world without you in it, and now you’re back and it's different. Little changes and little familiarities hit your heart a little harder than you thought they would just spending a few nights back at home.
Your parents clean the house for your visit, as if you hadn't been making and cleaning up messes in that house for your whole life. The ripped shower curtain is replaced, your neighbor's house is repainted, normally you wouldn't ever take note of these inconspicuous changes but as you search for familiarity in your old home, they stick out like a sore thumb.
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Unlike when you used to live there, you don’t want to spend all day and all night locked away in your room, so you bring your computer to the living room and continue to be antisocial, but in the living room while your dad watches Sunday Football, silently enjoying each other’s uncommon company.
For once, you don’t complain about having no food in the house, because at college, you actually have no food and now appreciate a full kitchen like you never did before. You get a little extra excited about making an apple crisp because it’s your first of the season, and go for three servings just because you can and you know there won’t be another like it until next year. When you watch TV, you don’t mind watching commercials or repeat Modern Family episodes or E!’s ‘Movies we love’ because for once you’re not watching Netflix in your squished twin bed with your earbuds pressed into the pillow while your roommates facetime their friends all night.
You look forward to seeing your high school and watching your little brother’s soccer game when just a few months ago you would be annoyed at spending time on these things. For the first time, you’re happy to just spend the day at home, and think of a day at home with your family as a day well spent, not a day wasted.
You visit work because you actually miss being there, and say hi to your managers and tell them you miss them and are doing well. Some friends will have changed but the true ones act as if not a day has gone by since you last spoke.
You don’t realize how much you miss those friends until you see them again. You don’t realize how much you miss your house and your bed and your family until you’re surrounded in it again. Your home is slowly outgrowing you, so thanks for welcoming me back as it keeps changing without me in it.
