Some of the most frustrating and agonizing times of my life have been when I call out to God for answers and He seems silent.

It’s frustrating because I have this undeniable need to feel that I’m in control of my life. Even though I pray about a situation, I usually have an idea of how I want that prayer to be answered and even how I would like that answer to look as it unfolds in my life. I’ve made plans for my life and I’ve arrogantly hoped and even prayed that my plans would be God’s plans.

I want to be comfortable. I want life to be easy—free of conflict, heartache, and disappointment (I realize this is delusional). There’s something to be said about comfort though—it feels good (at least at the time), it’s safe, and it’s easy.

Change is scary, but it becomes even more daunting when it isn’t what we were expecting and when it comes at a time we weren’t expecting. Having faith isn’t easy though and it isn’t supposed to be.

God doesn’t call us to be comfortable, content, or ordinary in anything that we do, especially in our faith. I’ve caught myself growing bitter towards God during seasons of heartache because I want Him to stop it. I want Him to fix my hurt, mend my relationships, heal my loved ones’ sickness, and make it all right again.

Because I don’t receive the answers I would like or I don’t receive His answers in the way I would like, I’ve doubted His sovereignty. That was the most heartbreaking part for me. I claim to be a Christian, yet I’ve doubted, questioned, and fought God’s answers. It disappointed me that my faith didn’t seem stronger than my circumstances.

In all my pride and arrogance, I somehow believed that my plans were better than His, and if I could just have my way, things would be better or at least feel better. This should go without saying, but I was entirely wrong.

Many times, I found myself avoiding my intuition to maintain surface-level contentment that brought me temporary satisfaction. It took a series of disappointments, heartaches, and failures for me to finally understand that God has been answering my prayers the whole time—just not at all in the way I would’ve preferred.

Despite my discomfort, bitterness, and doubt, He’s heard every word, seen every tear, and walked every step alongside me. God didn’t want to see me hurt, but He did want to see me grow—to stop and break free of my monotonous comfort zones. It took brokenness to experience being restored.

Our doubts don’t make us damaged Christians. We are just imperfect people living in an imperfect world—where things and people break our hearts almost daily. Friends betray us, relationships end, family members pass away, and we grow older. The dynamics of life continuously change, but Jesus never changes.

He never stops loving, protecting, and answering us when we call out to Him. Life teaches us to question people’s motives to protect our hearts, but we don’t have to question God—for He is the author of our hearts. I know without a doubt that I could not go through the challenges and disappointments of life without the peace that the Holy Spirit has brought and continues to bring to me through Jesus Christ. He’s always working… even when we are too busy to see it, or too prideful and impatient to be thankful for what He’s doing. He works in our lives and He designs a beautiful masterpiece. He knows our every prayer and He hears the cries of our hearts. He’s molding us and conditioning us into who we are called to be. We just have to listen.

Jesus longs for an intimate relationship with us—one where we trust Him during all seasons of life. Feeling lonely or abandoned by God is an indication of our own insecurities—those that come from not being able to comprehend the abundant and infinite love of the Creator. Our loneliness is not a reflection of Jesus’ heart for us.

He says in Hebrews Chapter 13, “Never will I leave you, nor forsake you.” That’s real loyalty—an unwavering and authentic display of love. The struggle to trust in God’s sovereign plan for our lives often signifies our mistrust of Him within our own hearts. We are impatient.

The beautiful thing is, He never stops waiting or providing. Just as parents never stop loving their children and leading them in the way they should go, Jesus patiently waits on us to return to the center of His will for our lives. There’s great comfort and peace in seeing throughout scripture that the Creator and God of the universe deeply cares about us. Peace and joy can be ours when we trust His faithfulness. In His timing and in His ways, He will answer and provide. The world will leave you empty, but God’s plans for your life are beautiful and so much greater than your disappointments.

If you’re living in a season of disappointment and heartache, know that you’re not alone. Life is hard, and Jesus doesn’t want you to live it alone. Have faith; He has great plans for you.

“But God doesn’t call us to be comfortable. He calls us to trust Him so completely that we are unafraid to put ourselves in situations where we will be in trouble if He didn’t come through.” –Francis Chan

“Our greatest fear should not be of failure but of succeeding at things in life that don’t really matter.” –Francis Chan

sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete not lacking anything.” James 1:2-4

“I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world." John 16:33

“He will cover you with his feathers. He will shelter you with his wings. His faithful promises are your armor and protection.” Psalm 91:4

"Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you.” Matthew 7:7

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11

“The Lord appeared to us in the past, saying: “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.” Jeremiah 31:3