I think one of my favorite things a friend has ever said to me is, "Boys are like dogs, they always come back". Place an emphasis on the dogs part. They're animals. There have been boys in my life for only a short time that left, and then apologized months later wanting a second chance, and there have been boys that left for a few days after being in my life long term, and begged for me back. Sometimes it takes only a few days for someone to realize what they lost and sometimes it takes months or even years. As you're reading this, I know someone has popped into your head. Whoever it is, read this when he comes back.
You deserve someone who doesn't give up on you when things get tough.
You deserve someone who recognizes that bad days just make you appreciate the good days more. You deserve someone who holds on to the good days and pushes through every obstacle. You deserve someone who refuses to give up on you because the thought of losing you destroys them. You deserve someone who supports you and helps you get through the bad days. Every relationship has its problems. Everyone makes mistakes. No relationship will ever be perfect. What is perfect is two people who refuse to give up on each other no matter what. When you work through things your relationship gets so much stronger.
You deserve someone who values and cares about your feelings.
You deserve someone that will think about their actions before doing something that could make you upset. You deserve someone who changes their actions after telling them something is bothering you. You deserve someone who respects your feelings instead of insulting them and telling you you're being ridiculous. Someone that truly cares about you will do anything to make sure you aren't hurting or going to sleep crying your eyes out over something they did or said. You deserve someone who makes your feelings a priority.
You deserve someone who puts effort into your relationship.
The little things are the big things. The little things he did to get you should continue after he has you. You deserve someone who puts 100% into your relationship. You deserve someone who is constantly trying to make you happy or make your relationship stronger. You deserve better than someone who doesn't try at all while you put everything you can into the relationship. It needs to go both ways.
You deserve someone who lifts you up, not tears you down.
You deserve someone who tells you you're beautiful and special every day. You deserve someone who brings so much love and positivity to your life. You don't deserve to constantly be harassed and torn down. Why be with someone who insults you? Why be with someone who blames you for everything? Why be with someone who never has anything positive to say? I found myself constantly going to my best friend after being ridiculed and she lifted me back up instantly. Look for someone who has the same effect as your best girl friend.
Remember your concerns throughout the relationship.
If you were concerned about a specific girl throughout your relationship and two days later you find out he's with her, remember that. Remember how he never showed you that he cared. Remember how he took you for granted and didn't appreciate anything you did for him. Remember how he didn't make you a priority. Remember all of it.
Remember how he made you feel.
It is very easy to overlook everything when he comes back because you love him, but remember how he made you feel during and after your relationship. After might just be the most important. If it is so easy for someone to diss you and delete you from their life why would you want to worry about that again? If all of your "ridiculous" concerns became a reality after he left, then you were right all along. Remember every little thing you saw or were told after he left. His actions after he leaves truly show how much he valued you or if he had any respect for you or how you felt. Whether you're together or not, trying to intentionally hurt someone after your relationship shows how much he valued the relationship when he had it. He didn't.
What was the last thing he said to you?
Was it "I'm sorry"? Was it "I still love you"? Was it "I don't want to be with you"? Whatever it was, remember it. Don't stop playing it over and over in your head.
When he comes back:
I promise you, he will realize what he lost one day. No matter how far down the road that day is. You now know what you deserve. You deserve the world. You deserve the best. You are one of a kind. No one else in the world will ever be you and that is so special. He will never have someone like you again. Someone will appreciate all the things he didn't. Someone won't give up on you. When he comes back, read this again. Unless he can change and prove to you to be all the things you deserve, tell him to pound sand. If you still love him through all the hurting, maybe it is meant to be. But remember what he said to you "sometimes loving someone isn't enough to stay with them". Make him show you he wants you back rather than just saying it. Make him do a lot to prove it to you. If he isn't willing to jump through hoops to get you back, then he never should've came back in the first place. If that's the case, he really never loved you and the best thing he ever did for you was to leave. You deserve so much more than that.
