I'm sure one of my first words was "No." Just like my niece, who says no quite often and totally knows what it means. Just to clarify for those in the back according to the internet, no is used for expressing a refusal or denial to a question, statement or literally anything else. It's pretty crazy how a 1-year-old understands that no means no, but some older humans don't understand the concept.
Why? It's literally so simple and people use it everyday to display displeasure during conversation. I'm almost positive that you know what no means. Clearly because I stated it above, you have no excuse not to now.
So why does it give the right to some people to think that no may actually mean yes? Just looking at the two words, they are different lengths, don't have the same letters at all, and sound different when said. Just a heads up everyone, in case you didn't know. I think you know where I'm going with this: I'm going to be focusing on people who identify as women.
When I started college I literally remember everyone telling me that one in four women get raped on a college campus. Wow, welcome to college right? It hit me, my three closest friends that I attend college with, make up that supposed statistic. I'm sure that isn't what they meant, random women can be picked and more than likely out of the four randomly picked had been sexually assaulted. So what if that happened to us four? We are four young girls who just started college, but we didn't ask to be that statistic just how women [and men] don't ask to be raped.
This whole umbrella term that I'm going to be using for this is rape culture. Rape culture is an environment where rape is widespread and in which sexual violence/abuse towards women is normalized and looked away at in the media and popular culture. Sounds ridiculous right? I swear this is real.
Below are some super lame excuses that I've seen that somehow "justify" rape (spoiler alert, it doesn't):
1. She was wearing something provocative, she was basically asking for it. You're right, her outfit was literally asking to be removed.
2. She wanted it but passed out, so I got the okay before that. You got the okay when she was coherent, now she isn't. Why, just why. Seriously.
3. I was doing them a favor. A favor means an attitude of approval or liking. Looks like you messed up that definition, clearly.
4. She wasn't going to get laid anytime soon, no one else would have wanted her, she's lucky. She didn't want you, plain and simple.
5. He was a great student and athlete, he has a great future, you don't want to ruin that now do you? Yes absolutely, he ruined someone else's life, he made that person feel worthless. Justice needs to be served, common sense.
Crappy excuses am I right? It's literally come down to this, people producing underwear that reminds people to "Ask First," how sad is that. People literally need reminders to be a decent human being, come on world.
Growing up as a girl has taught me to not go out late, never put down your drink, if you're walking alone at night to have your keys in your hands like Wolverine and so many other things, and that sucks for girls growing up everywhere. What's going to suck even more is when I decide to bring a child into this world and she happens to be a girl, I will probably be teaching her the same things I've learned. Cue sad evil queen because she knows.
You know what's hot? Consent. I swear to you. There is no excuse for rape, seriously, why is this so hard to understand. No matter how a person was dressed, what time of day it was, who they were with, if they were flirting or what substances were consumed, no one asked to be raped. Don't be rape shaming people, they literally have been through hell and managed to survive it. Don't be that person.