There's one thing on every transgender person's mind once they come out of the closet.
"Do I go by a different name?"
It's a big deal for someone, in one moment you give yourself a new title that you live by for the rest of your life. But what goes in the process of picking a new name? How do you choose? Hell, do you really need to change your name at all?
(The answer to that is no. If you come out as a trans person, there's no rule that you need to change your name at all- but that's a story for another article).
I think there's a stigma society has with trans people. We're expected to automatically choose the opposite sex version of our name when transitioning. It's the "easy choice."
(For example: my name would be Steven if I had gone that route, but I obviously didn't.)
But why? Why should we do that? Why do we need to conform to another one of society's expectations?
We don't.
Now, if you do decide to go that route and pick the opposite sex version of your birth name, there's nothing wrong with that! This article is not meant to offend anyone at all.
But to give an example circumstance, some people have bad memories associated with their birth name, they want nothing to do with it after they come out. So, how do you choose the next step in your life?
Every trans person is different, but I feel like it's one of those things where you just know. You hear yourself being referred to in that name and you know it feels right.
Here's another example scenario for you; my story.
When I was little, I was obsessed with the name "Sam". It was the name I used for everything. Whenever I started a new video game, my icon was always named Sam and I always picked a boy. So when I first came out to my GSA club freshmen year, I asked to be called Sam. But as soon as people started calling me it, I just knew. It didn't feel right.
But then I got to thinking, what makes me happy?
Freshmen year, I was really into this one actor/singer. As someone who deals with anxiety, a lot of times I would lean towards that actor and it would make me feel a lot better. The man inspired me a great deal. So, that's how I picked the name I go by now.
"You named yourself after an actor?"
Okay trans friends, never be afraid of naming yourself after someone who provides a good memory. All I have to say about that is cisgender people name their children after themselves all the time, and there's nothing wrong with that.
Naming yourself after someone else is something to be proud of.
So, how do I conclude?
To the transgender people just coming out, who are in that stage of maybe picking a new name, don't be afraid. Don't be afraid to name yourself something that you will be proud of. Be comfortable, and don't forget that it's your choice, not someone else's.
Don't be afraid to be who you are.
