I came across this image on Facebook this morning, and it immediately got me thinking about one of the hottest topics for wheelchair users:
Does your wheelchair define who you are?
Much like that of the person who posted it, my initial reaction was, “of course not!” Just because I use a wheelchair to get around doesn’t mean it makes me, ME. It doesn’t dictate my personality, my beliefs, or my life in general. It doesn’t decide what I do with my days or what I like and dislike. Or does it?
The thing is, being in a wheelchair is a HUGE part of my life. Apart from being in the pool, I can’t sit up or move around without it or the help of another human. While it may not dictate my personality or my moral views per se, it does have a major influence on my day to day activities. For example, if a restaurant or a shop is not wheelchair accessible, I can’t visit it. If sidewalks do not contain ramps, I can’t use them. If a building doesn’t have an elevator, I can’t get upstairs. If there’s no handicap parking available, getting out of my van is often a challenge. If my wheelchair isn’t charged (usually my own fault), I can’t go anywhere.
Because I’m in a wheelchair, I hate the beach. My chair is not sand or water friendly. Do you know how frustrating it is to not be able to move away from sand? It’d be one thing if I could walk through it, but all I can do is lay in it with my face very close to it. It’s not fun to have it constantly in your eyes and in other not-so-appropriate places. And if I want to cool off in the water, someone has to pick me up and put me in it. It’s just not fun.
Because I’m in a wheelchair, I am not a fan of the French Quarter or Uptown New Orleans. Yes, it’s artsy and cultural and all that fun stuff, but have you looked at the sidewalks? Or the parking? Or the fact that nearly every shop, gallery, and restaurant has a step up into them? Do you know how painful brick and cobblestone can be to roll over and over and over?
Because I’m in a wheelchair, I can’t go on a lot of vacations that involve hiking, skiing, whitewater rafting or anything physical. Any hotel I stay in needs to be easily accessible, and there are some chains that I avoid like the plague due to accommodation issues. Flying is difficult with a wheelchair, so it’s never something I look forward to (though I love actually being up in the air). I have to have MY car to go somewhere, or I have to rent a very expensive handicapped accessible van at my destination. If these services aren’t available where I want to go, then I generally don’t go.
Because being in a wheelchair is something I’ve always had to work with and I don’t know any differently, I do think it has defined who I am to a certain extent. It somewhat dictates what experiences I can and can’t have, and as you grow up, those experiences are what help define you as you. Certainly being in a wheelchair isn’t the only defining factor of my life – I have my family, friends, and other experiences where being in a wheelchair is irrelevant. But it is a big one. When I’m in my chair, it IS part of me. I’m in control of it, and I’m responsible for it. My wheelchair is more then “just how I get around.“