When it comes to relationships in college, it’s no secret that they hard to, not only find, but also maintain for a lasting period of time. Everyone is looking for that special someone to cuddle up with, especially as the colder months are approaching, and spend time with to do just about everything with. Time and time again, from my female and male friends, I hear the question of, “What’s wrong with me?” And I’m here to make it known that absolutely nothing is wrong with anyone.

College is a place of never ending change. These changes occur day-to-day, but more importantly year-to-year. Coming into this portion of your life, you’ve heard plenty of times that college is where you find yourself. The things you appreciate, what you’re passionate about, the things you dislike, and, most notably, the people you enjoy surrounding yourself with. Yes, all of these aspects are true, and yes, you will discover all of those things, but sometimes the other person or people you’re interested in haven’t yet, and that’s okay. That does not mean that anything is wrong with you.

Every person you come in contact with in college has their strengths and weakness, and, whether they are known to that individual or not, it is not your duty to “figure them out” by “playing a game.” It is up to that person, on their own, to realize who they are and the type of person they want to be. Some people don’t figure this out until they’re thirty years old, so why are we expecting our peers to know by the age of twenty-one? Why are we blaming ourselves for things that are out of our personal control? Why do we automatically assume something is wrong with ourselves? The thing is, it’s not even that there is something wrong in general, because there isn’t. The only thing that’s wrong is our outlook. Never forget that life has a plan and that, if whomever you like now doesn’t feel the same towards you, there is someone far better out in the world that will come into your future one day. Everything takes time.

There is not, nor will there ever be, a characteristic about yourself that is flawed. Different people appreciate different aspects and attributes of others lives’. Sometimes they match up, but most of the time they don’t. You are perfect the way you are, and don’t ever let anyone try to change you or the person you’re becoming. Too often we fall short of other expectations, but what about the expectations we set for ourselves? Do we fall short of them? This is something that I personally think people forget about and overlook in college…myself included.

So the next time you go to think to yourself, “what’s wrong with me?” Stop. Reflect on the bigger picture that there are SO many aspects that pertain to developing an intimate and long-lasting relationship with another human being. I promise you that one day you will find that. It might not be today, tomorrow, and even a year from now, but that special someone will come along and, in that moment, you will realize there was, and never will be, anything wrong with you.