Hello everyone! I keep finding that a lot of people I know are ending up with engagements or marriages already and it’s safe to say that I’ve been kinda freaking out. In one of my psychology classes we learned about the social clock. But what is it?
The social clock is a timetable in which we expect major events to occur throughout our life. You hear many things like, “just because they’re doing it, doesn’t mean you has to do it as well,” and, “if your friends jump off a cliff, are you going to jump off a cliff?” It’s about the same concept as those sayings. Just because it seems like everyone else is getting married doesn’t mean you have to rush to get married.
I have learned that everyone has a different timetable for their lives. While some are getting married or taking trips around the world in celebration of graduating, I’m looking at graduate schools and figuring out a job to have between schools. But it is a social clock. Which means I will feel behind my age group if I don’t fulfill those life events the same time that they do.
It can be a tough thing to think about when looking around at all your friends. I’m probably the perfect example of failing the social timetable. I’m two years behind in school, very single, and still working a part time job. I always feel behind my age group and often times I feel like I’m going to end up unsuccessful because of it. However, that’s not the case. I’m just doing it all a little differently then they are.
So what’s the rush to get married and have kids? What’s the rush to finish school and get a full time job? It will all happen at some point. So why not take the time to enjoy the scenery, smell the flowers, and skip through the meadow. They do say good things come to those who wait right? So why do we not wait?
Personally, I have accepted where I’m at in life compared to others my age. Sure it’s hard but it’s my life and I can’t jump ahead three years. It doesn’t work like that. But that’s life. It’s spontaneous and nothing is promised.
So don’t worry if Tom and Sue are now married and you’re still single. Don’t settle. Don’t rush. Don’t freak out. It’s okay to be behind. It’s okay to be a little bit off. It’s okay. Keep living your life but make sure you enjoy it. You don’t want to look back and see how unhappy you were. The best stories will come during those adventurous and happy times you’ve had.
Go travel the world, step out of your comfort zone and push your boundaries. There’s no rush to do anything. Just stop and smell the damn flowers. Take it all in and live it up. Be happy and be you.
Until next time,
Another ADHD Student