When I give someone my word, I mean it.

I generally assume others will do the same but as we quickly learn in life, just because we are willing to do something for someone else does not mean that they are willing to do it for us; which leads me to the issue of making assumptions.

We inherently make assumptions based on what others say to us because as humans we have two main forms of communication: speech and action. With that being said, I found out fairly early in this game that words can't make up for actions, only actions truly make up for actions.

The problem with words (though there are many, such as how to properly pronounce the words caramel or pecan and the bizarre concept that some words are spelled the same but have totally different meanings, a.k.a homographs) is that they're either misused, overused or perfectly used, kind of like the three bowls of porridge that Goldilocks taste tested that one time.

And just like the porridge in Goldilocks, sometimes what lies behind these weighted and unweighted words is a total bear...

The misused words miss the mark and essentially go cold/have no effect, the overused words come in too hot and the perfectly used words are the ones that feel just right.

I've never been one to like ambiguity or gray area, I like black and white. I like knowing where I stand and I like honesty and integrity. I like perfectly used words. In fact, gray area in conversation makes me incredibly uncomfortable because being able to make sense of abstract concepts is a foundational element of who I am, down to my bones; which just so happen to be white, not gray, as are yours! Which is why I am eternally perplexed as to why some individuals continue to live in the gray area.

I often wonder if my distaste for the gray area comes out of my own prior habits to always say "I'm fine" when asked what's bothering me. If someone knows you well enough to ask what's bothering you because something in your demeanor denotes to them that you're not okay, then I would venture to say that more times than not, you can feel safe by offering them an honest, black and white answer.

If we use the words "I'm fine" then they should mean exactly that. However, the opposite has become true in our society and if I were to play devil's advocate to the previous point that I just made, then I would say that a complete stranger could infer that you are not actually "fine" when you reply "I'm fine."

This is because the phrase "I'm fine" has become synonymous with "I'm really not okay but I don't feel like creating a disturbance so as far as you're concerned, yes; I'm fine."

What about adjectives that have lost their power too? When someone uses the word "awesome," I hope with every fiber of my being that they mean it. That would mean that whatever it is they are experiencing or looking at is truly "awe-inspiring." When someone next to you at work uses the word "starving" before a lunch break to buy a $15.00 salad and a Kombucha, they're probably not actually starving but again, as a society, this powerful word now simply means "hm, I'm kinda hungry, I ate breakfast two hours ago but it was just a granola bar so now I consider myself starving."

Maybe you're wondering what the actual definitions of these words are. Well, according to Merriam-Webster to be "starving" means to "suffer or perish from deprivation." The dictionary also says that when something is "awesome" it means that it is "inspiring awe" and that we could also use words like "terrific" or "fantastic" instead. I find this to be incredibly exciting that there are bigger, more weighted words to describe bigger feelings and bigger moments.

As I've mentioned, words can be a bear to unpack, decode and make sense of. Especially when misused or not meant properly. Call it an inflation of meaning, or whatever you'd like but I am going to call it "misleading" because that's how I feel. If you ask me how I'm doing and I say "awesome" and you say "me too," you better know that I am going to be completely thrilled for you because feeling awe-inspired is totally awesome. Maybe if everyone knew what true awesomeness felt like, sunsets and breathtaking views would be awesome and your favorite bag of chips would no longer be awe-inspiring but rather "delicious" or "enjoyable."

So, what's in a word? A bunch of letters with a whole lot of meaning.