I’m sure you’ve heard it all before. Today’s society sucks when it comes to dating. We have relationships where we don’t know if we’re committed or not, but no one says a word. We have the dreaded word “things” where you both like each other and basically go on dates, but you’re not official. And then there’s this lovely term that ends most of these types of so-called "relationships" named “ghosting.” Ghosting is where a man or woman goes on dates and acts like everything is normal, then one of them completely cuts off all contact with the person they were dating and ignores them without telling them why. This person will sometimes reach out to the person they ghosted because they're terrible manipulators and want something else (probably physical stuff), and other times they'll reach out in hopes to actually reconnect and try again.
This is the epitome of why our society sucks at dating.
Yes, I have been ghosted before, and no I’m not bringing it up because I’m still frustrated that it happened. In fact, it happened over the summer, so I do not wish to date this guy any longer. I mean, it would be nice if I could punch him in the face once or twice…or a million times, BUT I know I’m worth more than that and it's more than likely that I would go to jail if I did anyways.
So here’s my take on how to deal with someone who ghosts you: pray for them.
I know. Roll your eyes at me. What a Christian thing to say, huh? Guess what? I don’t care. In fact, I pray for the guy who ghosted me quite often. I worry about him, not because I wish things went differently, but because I know he's a human being with feelings. Under the shell of a man he was on the outside and beyond all the walls he put up, I know there was a glowing heart inside of him. I mean, he was once a part of my life and we did date for a little while until things ended abruptly, so I know of this because I got to know him. The abruption to the end of our failed "relationship" (I wouldn't even call it that since it lasted less than a month) isn’t necessarily what worries me. It’s what was left unsaid. At first I thought that maybe he just lost interest, or disliked something he found out about me. But for some reason I began wondering again, yet more in depth.
Something serious could have happened to him. Maybe he’s still not over his last relationship. Maybe he’s struggling with depression. Maybe he just guards his heart because he’s not ready to let someone in again. I don’t know why entirely, and either way I would've understood anyway. But I still worry about him. Take it by Matthew 5:44, "But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you." So I’ve turned to prayer because I know in my heart that God will hear me, and He has never failed to answer my prayers. Not once.
So pray for the person who ghosted you in hopes God will guide them in the right direction. Who knows, they might actually come around and tell you what actually happened.