Let’s be honest, interviews are literally the worst. They are awkward and intimidating. They are stressful and uncomfortable. And unfortunately, they are unavoidable if you want to be a successful adult. For anyone who has ever experienced this, here are some thoughts that we have all had during an interview:
Tell me about you!
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I know you want me to dazzle you with my unique hobbies, activities, and accomplishments, but in all honesty, I spend a significant amount of my time watching Netflix. Yes, I’m apart of some really cool organizations. Yes, I work well with others and I am good at time management. But I would much rather give you a recap of the season of “Scandal” I watched yesterday than the monologue I have been rehearsing for this question.
What do you know about the company?
Time to recite everything I learned from your ‘About’ page. Then I am going to throw in an obscure fact that I learned from one of the other pages on your website so that it looks like I did some in-depth research when in reality I only skimmed your website on my IPhone before I came in here.
Why do you want this job?
I like money and the things I can do with the money? Is this an acceptable answer?
What are your strengths?
I can nap like nobody’s business. I can make a mean PB and J sandwich. I can go a whole day without putting pants on. Oh strengths related to the job? Ugh…..I work well with others?
What is your greatest weakness?
French fries would be the most realistic answer. But I am now going to talk about a ‘weakness’ that is not really a weakness and turn it into a positive trait. Example: Sometimes I am just too nice and I am working on being more assertive.
Why should we hire you over other candidates?
Bruh, I don’t know. I’ve been told I have a winning personality? Isn’t it your job to decide why one candidate is better than the other? How do I tactfully say that I am better than other people? I’m just going to give you a small anecdote of an experience that I've had that relates to this job and how it would help me be a good employee. I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU WANT!!
Do you have any questions?
Not really, but I’ve been told that it’s good to have at least three questions prepared for interviews so here we go.
