If you do not believe that Trump has committed sexual assault, click off this article. Among countless others, his ex-wife Ivana swore under oath that he raped her. If you do not already believe his numerous accusers (not to mention his own bragging about sexual assault), this article is not going to spend time trying to convince you, especially when Trump himself has made it clear he has touched women non-consensually.

Trump represents everyone’s abuser. It’s impossible to look at him, and especially to hear the Billy Bush audio relentlessly played on the news, without reliving one’s own assault to some extent. Seeing him now that he is the President-elect is even more painful and revolting. His election clearly demonstrates that being a rapist is not grounds for disqualification from even the highest office in the land.

What is possibly even more horrifying is to realize that some of your loved ones may have voted for him. People do not seem to grasp what makes this so nauseating (hint: it’s not that we “lost” the election; it’s not that we didn’t get our way; and it’s not that we’re intolerant of differing opinions). The problem is realizing that these people, who claim to care about you, would vote your abuser into office too. The fact that your abuser assaulted you would not stop these “loved ones” from voting for them. Obviously, by extension, this also means that they wouldn’t want your abuser to be punished in any way for their actions, since it doesn’t even disqualify them from leading the country, let alone necessitate some kind of legal action.

By voting for Trump, these people have proclaimed themselves as individuals that you cannot trust, that you cannot confide it, and that you could never discuss your assault with. If they agreed with your abuser’s political views, your assault wouldn’t even tinge their decision to vote them into office. These are not people who care about or love you. Loved ones support you and would want your abuser to be punished for their actions.

Trump feels like everyone’s abuser. To look at and listen to him is to feel many other women’s pain just as sharply as you feel your own. To see people, especially in your own social circle, support and commend him is to see them support and commend the person who assaulted you. You are not being dramatic when your worst memories are brought to the surface just by seeing Trump’s face or hearing his voice. It is not just a “political disagreement” when someone you care about praises a rapist, and you are fully justified in removing toxic people from your social environment.