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Relationships

To A Friend Who Is Struggling

When it is hard to find the words to say.

Sara Huettner

Nov 07, 2016

University of Saint Thomas Minnesota

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My Dear Friend,

I understand that you are in pain, and that I cannot possibly know exactly what that is like for you. I do not know what thoughts are spinning in your mind, or what weight is crushing your heart. But, I do know I can see your pain. I have felt pain because you are in pain. Every headache, every stomach growl, and every tear I have experienced because you are an extension of my heart. You shared yourself with me and I with you. Nothing could stop me from caring about you.

I know the capability of pain. It can ruin you. It can drown you in sorrow and drag your body into a dark abyss. But when getting washed away, you can either sink lower or fight to get to the surface. Do you want to breathe again? Do you want to feel the warmth of the sunlight touch your cheeks, and freckle your skin? Whether you do or do not, it is certainly not up to me.

I am simply the life preserver waiting above your head. I may not be able to reach down and get you, for I am only able to float the surface. But if you could extend your hand to me, we can float together. Share with me what is under the surface. Do not fret, I know you cannot sink me too.

With all of my pain, there have been lessons to learn, and I am going to share those with you. First and foremost, no one can determine your worth but you. Your future and your success in life is measured in how you think about success, not anyone else's definition. A single person cannot tell you what to want, or whom to be. So I must ask: who do you want to be? If the answer is someone other than you are now, make that change. I know it can be scary, and it will for sure be difficult, but you are not alone. May I repeat, the second lesson is that you are never alone. You have the life preserver to make you float, but you also have the rope which pulls you to shore. One friend can pull you up, but many can pull you to your future. You just have to trust in them, and let them guide you when you are lost. Thirdly, give into your feelings. Like the waves in the ocean they will toss you and turn you until you feel sick, but they do not last forever. All the pain you are in now will pass as if it were just a storm, I promise.

Everything will be ok. You will be ok. I love you.

-Sara

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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To A Friend Who Is Struggling

When it is hard to find the words to say.

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The Best Lines from the Fab Four

And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make

The sun is up, the sky is blue, it's beautiful and so are you

Love is old, love is new, love is all, love is you

There's nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be

Life is very short, and there's no time for fussing and fighting, my friend

He say, "I know you, you know me", One thing I can tell you is you got to be free

Oh please, say to me, You'll let me be your man. And please say to me, You'll let me hold your hand

It was twenty years ago today, Sgt. Pepper taught the band to play. They've been going in and out of style, but they're guaranteed to raise a smile

Living is easy with eyes closed, misunderstanding all you see

Can you hear me? When it rains and shine, it's just a state of mind

Little darling, it's been long cold lonely winter. Little darling, it feels like years since it' s been here. Here comes the sun, Here comes the sun, and I say it's alright

We danced through the night and we held each other tight, and before too long I fell in love with her. Now, I'll never dance with another when I saw her standing there

I love you, I love you, I love you, that's all I want to say

You say you want a revolution. Well you know, we all want to change the world

All the lonely people, where do they all come from. All the lonely people, where do they all belong

Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends

Hey Jude, don't make it bad. Take a sad song and make it better

Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away. Now it looks as though they're here to stay. Oh, I believe in yesterday

And when the brokenhearted people, living in the world agree, there will be an answer, let it be.

And anytime you feel the pain, Hey Jude, refrain. Don't carry the world upon your shoulders

I'll give you all I got to give if you say you'll love me too. I may not have a lot to give but what I got I'll give to you. I don't care too much for money. Money can't buy me love

All you need is love, love is all you need

Whisper words of wisdom, let it be

Blackbird singing in the dead of night, Take these broken wings and learn to fly. All your life, You were only waiting for this moment to arise

Though I know I'll never lose affection, for people and things that went before. I know I'll often stop and think about them. In my life, I love you more

Obviously the best superpower.

There have been many lessons learned.

1. The importance of traditions.

2. How to be thankful for family and friends.

3. How to give back.

4. What the word "community" really means.

5. That it isn't about the destination, but the journey.

6. The consequences of making bad choices.

7. To trust people, until you have a reason not to.

8. To be welcoming and accepting of everyone.

9. How to be my own, individual person.

10. How to work for what I want.

11. How to be great at giving directions.

12. How to be humble.

13. To be well-rounded.

14. How to be great at conflict resolution.

15. The beauty of getting outside and exploring.

16. To be prepared for anything.

17. That you don't always have to do it alone.

18. How to be creative.

19. To brush off gossip.

I have never been so thankful to know you.

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

Don't freak out

Email the professor

Attend the first class

Keep attending class

Have a backup plan

Remember that everything works out at the end

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