Happy holidays! Break out the alcoholic egg nog because it's time for that annual family get-together that involves relatives asking you 101 questions about school, relationships, and your social life. Yeah, yeah, they love you and they are just trying to catch up with you. We know you guys miss us, but dang.
The weeks leading up to Christmas are even worse. Everyone wants to know what to get you. Honestly, by the time the semester is over, all you want is a bit of sanity. However, I have compiled a list of goodies that your favorite college kid wants this holiday season.
1. A full eight hours of sleep.
2. Their laundry done for them.
3. A hot flip-flopless shower.
4. Some home cooking.
5. Maybe some more food before we continue...
6. Clean, fresh sheets.
7. To pet their dog and/or cat.
8. A hug from mom.
9. Pizza.
10. Being able to go to the bathroom without someone else in the stall next to them.
11. Or the use of quality hand soap again.
12. The ability to sing in the shower without judgment.
13. Alcohol. Lots and lots of alcohol.
14. For just ONCE a relative not to ask if they have a boyfriend yet
(Okay so maybe you are straight but hey, this excuse gets them off your back for a little.)
15. Or to not be asked about grades.
16. Or your classes next semester.
17. Their mom taking care of them if they get sick.
18. To forget that they are legally an adult with responsibilities.
19. And that their break is only about four weeks long.
20. To not have to put up with the bullsh*t of their roommate.
21. The freedom to use their car once again.
22. Quality toilet paper.
23. Silence.
24. The chance to use REAL silverware, plates, and cups.
25. Your dad to fix things when they are broken.
26. Literally any necessity you might need in college.
Okay, so maybe you can't put a price tag on ALL these things...but if you are truly stuck on what to get your child for the holidays, resort to #26 immediately. Or #13.
I will also take my presents in the form of fuzzy socks, a renewed subscription of Netflix, and a puppy.
Nonetheless, whatever you get us this year, know we are just thankful to finally be back spending time with you. We might sound like we are having a blast in college, cause we are, but nothing beats out on some cute family time.
BUT FOR GOODNESS SAKE, DON'T ASK ABOUT SCHOOL.