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What To Do When You Were Wrong

Forgive yourself.

Nov 29, 2018

Jamie Street

We tend to think we know a lot. Even when we don't know a lot about something, we often pretend that we do as some sort of defense mechanism to protect our fragile egos. Sometimes we're right, a lot of times we're wrong. I find that when I am wrong (which I, like most, hate to be), I regress into this weird, compounding state of defeat where I overcompensate for my wrongdoing by aggressively over-apologizing, then "move forward" by taking the rest of it out on myself. And so, I've developed a checklist. So, what, you were wrong? We often are. Instead of sending yourself spiraling, here's a step-by-step for how to stay sane through your mistakes.

Admit it. To yourself, then to others.

The first and hardest step. We all have inherently large egos considering our inevitable placement at the very center of our respective universes. Reality exists by us and other people exist through us. This isn't an inherently wrong proclivity— there is no conceivable way to make sense of the world if not by way of prioritizing our own perspectives. Yet, we must admit that other perspectives exist, just as other people exist, and those other perspectives, though not placed at the convenient center of our universe, can be just as if not more valid for that very reason.

Apologize for that which you are sorry, don’t apologize for that which you are not.

The latter is crucial. If you apologize for more than you mean, the true apology bears little weight. Diluting an apology is like rejecting a compliment. Both reactions present issues of insincerity rooted in our personal discomfort. By reacting insincerely, we transmit discomfort to the other person, making them unsure of how to digest our true intentions. We must learn how to rightly give and how to rightly accept.

Do not dwell.

Do all you can to rectify the situation and there will be no reason to allow your guilt to linger. Know what you are responsible for, your actions and your reactions, and then enforce your boundaries. Once you have given the apology owed, do not allow yourself to feel (or anyone to make you feel) as though you owe anything more.

Allow your mistakes to inform your future success.

If you realize too late—to the point where an apology would be futile— forgive yourself. Establish a conscious effort to do, to be, better.

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What To Do When You Were Wrong

Forgive yourself.

In This Article:

Admit it. To yourself, then to others.

Apologize for that which you are sorry, don’t apologize for that which you are not.

Do not dwell.

Allow your mistakes to inform your future success.

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This isn't just for the single Pringles out there either, folks

Run Around Clanging Pots and Pans in Everyone's Face

Eat the Last Few Pigs in a Blanket

Pop Twelve White Grapes

Burn Something

Smash Things Against a Wall

Spontaneously Begin an Irish Jig

Call Your Mother

Throw a Coffee Table Out a Window

Sing "Auld Lang Syne" at the Top of Your Lungs

Do Some Squats

Swan Dive into a Nearly Freezing Body of Water

Take a Shot

Time to be merry and bright.

"First Noel" by Leslie Odom, Jr

"A Holly Jolly Christmas" by Burl Ives

"Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" by Kelly Clarkson

"All I Want for Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey

"Christmas (Baby Please Come Home" by Michael Buble

"Last Christmas" by Taylor Swift

"The Christmas Song" by Josh Groban

"White Christmas" by Idina Menzel

"O Holy Night" by David Archuleta

"Believe" by Josh Groban

"Les cloches du hameau" by Celine Dion

Or at least try to do.

1. I will wake up (sorta) on time for class.

2. I will look decent for class.

3. I will go to the gym more.

4. I will go to the library and study more.

5. I will meet new people.

For those long nights that turn into mornings when the struggle is real.

1. Walk in motivated and ready to rock

2. Disappointed you let it get this bad

3. Distracted: When a 10-Minute Break Becomes an Hour

4. When the Yearning for Sleep Sneaks Up

5. In the words of Lorelai Gilmore "Coffee, Coffee, Coffee"

Oh, so done.

You need sleep, but also have 13 things due in the span of 4 days.

1. When it's December 1 and you have seven things due, three exams, and haven't slept in three days.

2. So you stress.

3. And cry.

4. Then call your mom to cry some more.

5. After the pep talk, you feel determined to get everything done.

6. But, now you're tired.

7. And really hungry.

8. Suddenly, it's 2 a.m. and you have only written three sentences and your paper is due in the morning.

9. You've made it to Friday... somehow.

10. Then Sunday hits and you find yourself back at the Lib.

11. So you cry some more.

12. But, you fight through the tears to get everything done because you're determined.

13. In the end, you feel on top of the world because you made it through the last week of class alive.

14. But, now it's finals week so good luck.

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