My best friend's mother never let her come over to my house. She was let out for my birthday and for prom, but she never came over to hang out on a Friday night. I always assumed she was protective, that she just wanted to keep her daughter safe, but there is a very distinctive difference between keeping someone safe and keeping them caged. My best friend never gets anywhere on time. It was a running joke in our friend group: "she's late again." Until there came a time it wasn't funny, until none of us could reach her and we didn't know why. Until she started coming in with red-rimmed eyes and I realized that maybe her mother was doing more than she was letting on.

The problems came to light when she stopped answering me and came to school with her head down. I knew how to cheer her up, but here's everything else I had no idea about.

They won't tell you how helpless you're going to feel. Your best friend is in pain and you can't do anything except call a hotline.

They won't tell you how much you're going to want to save her. Watching her get into her mother's car will kill you and you will want nothing more than to hold onto her and not let her go.

They won't tell you how many conversations you're going to have with her boyfriend. He doesn't know what happened with the last boy, so he's never really understood her mother, but he knows that something isn't right with how her mother views him. He wants to save her so badly, but he can't do anything more than drive to her house and look at the hell she is living in because going in would hurt her more.

They won't tell you how worried you will be. Every time she's late or doesn't answer or you don't see her during the day, your heart will be in your throat. When you see her riding her bike home because her mother will no longer drive her to school, you will be terrified that she will ride into traffic.

They won't tell you that she will only have two people on her side. One of them will be you. One will be her boyfriend. You will pray to God that he doesn't leave. You will pray to God that he catches things that you miss, that he sees things that you don't.

They won't tell you that she is now scarred. She was broken before and her boyfriend helped you find all the pieces and put her back together. But she is shattered again. All her parts are lying on the floor and everyone gets to come along and poke them and cut them and do whatever they want. It is your job to keep her safe now. It is your job to keep your girl alive.

Abuse isn't always beating. It isn't always obvious signs of distress. Abuse is your best friend watching her mother pack her things, blame her and leave. I don't believe I'll ever understand my best friend's mother. I'll never understand how she made my strong, beautiful girl feel so low. I'll never understand how this happens. But it needs to stop. People like her mother need to stop hurting people like my best friend.