In the Greek system, initiation is the most important thing that happens during the semester, or for some chapters, for the year. Greek life isn’t just the crazy themed dances, the competitions throughout the year, or even the endless amount of t-shirts (though those are all perks). Greek life at the end of the day is about the bond you have with your fellow chapter members. It’s knowing that at any moment you can call on nearly anyone in your chapter and they will listen or help if they can. Initiation is what holds this bond with your sorority or fraternity together.

Initiation is the ritual ceremony during the year where sorority new members pledge to uphold the values and ideals of the bond they are seeking to join. It’s like a marriage to your sorority. Once you initiate one, you can’t initiate any others, so maybe not totally like a marriage, but it is a big commitment. For some, it is a sacred one. This is the ceremony where the new members learn the secrets and history of their organization. It’s a night when active members unite with the new members and accept them into the sisterhood. It’s the first time you can finally call yourself a member.

It’s a nerve-racking night. If you watched any TV show or movie that has ever referenced sorority initiation, you may think you have an idea of what initiation is. Although the ceremonial aspect is true, that may be the only real part of the initiations you see on TV. It’s something to be excited for, not scared of. Maybe you’re still nervous though because you don’t know what to expect, but you shouldn’t be. It’s easy to believe anything someone tells you about initiation because you don’t really know otherwise, but odds are you won’t be asked to do anything crazy. If you are, you may want to evaluate your membership, and if it is really something worth doing.

For most (if not all) sororities, the days of hazing have long since past, though I wish I could say the same for fraternities. Your sisters want you to be a part of the bond that they joined during their time in college. They hand picked you during recruitment just weeks before. They know more about you than you realize, but they want you. You weren’t given a bid by chance, but by choice. They don’t want you to have to prove yourself. When they gave you that bid it meant that they knew you were good enough.

Joining a sorority is a chance for family beyond your biological one. You might not be best friends with all of your chapter (it’s pretty hard to handle that many girls), but at the end of the day every member of your chapter knows that you can come together for one thing: your sorority. Your sorority is your common ground. It doesn’t define who you are as a person, but hopefully makes you redefine who you want to be, someone better than you were before. Initiation is the first step in becoming the best version of yourself, so enjoy the perks and stand with pride during your ceremony.