Things My Sister Has Taught Me:

Having a big sister is truly a blessing. I know I did not always feel this way, but now I couldn't imagine my life without her. She has taught me so much about being the woman I am today. So here is to all the great big sisters in the world: We love you!

1. How to Smile

No literally. I really did not know the correct form of smiling when I was younger. I still don’t hear the end of it. But she was always able to make me smile when she wanted to. After a sad movie, a bad day, being sick or hurt, and of course heartbreaks, she could always bring me back to reality and remind me what it feels like to smile. She is the biggest goofball! She reminds me that life is about being yourself and having fun. What better way to do that than to make the people you love smile?

2. The Importance of Quality Friends

Growing up, I would get picked on a lot. I had a tough time making friends. The friends I did make, were not always the nicest to me. This continued throughout my teen years. But my sister refused to let me forget my self-worth. She was always the one to tell me the truth, even when it was hard for me to hear it. She stuck up for me when I deserved it and put me in my place when I needed it. This not only helped me learn who my real friends were, but it taught me how to be a good friend back to them.

3. How To Survive Heartbreak

It is probably one of the hardest lessons in life I have learned. Not only does it hurt to be left, it hurts when you choose to leave someone. Even beyond that, it hurts when things end badly. It hurts to be lied to and cheated on. To be made to believe you are a bad lover. But my sister has taught me that there is no deed that is unforgivable. And that choosing to forgive someone does not require you to face them again. She has taught me that no matter how many times I feel like I cannot go on, that hope never dies. She has taught me that sometimes all you need is a bucket of ice cream or a bottle of wine, and a friend to talk to. She taught me how to be strong.

4. Respecting Our Parents

Man was I a brat. I’m not ashamed to admit that because I have grown. I went through the same phase that most high school students go through. The “I’m going to be 18 and I won’t have to listen to you” phase. I have said things I can never take back. It took me a long time and multiple conversations with my sister to understand exactly how my parents deserved to be treated. Even more than her telling me what I could do to make amends or to solve any issues, she SHOWED me how to treat them. She helped do chores around the house and she spoke to them with respect. I remember the first time a saw my mom and sister having a heart to heart conversation and I went to my room and cried. My sister made me realize that our family would always be there and that nothing comes before them.

5. What Real Love Looks Like

She will never know how important this lesson was. It may be strange to say that my sister taught me this considering that I have never met anyone more in love with each other than my parents. However, it was always this way for me growing up. It was normal and that felt more like a mommy daddy deal than an “in love” deal when you are younger. However, my sister and I are only 4 years apart. I got to learn from all of her mistakes, and relearn them when I made the same ones. I thought I knew what love was, and what it felt like to be in love. I even thought that I had reached that point in my life. Then my sister got married. If that was not special enough, my sister and her husband had a baby. I was I could describe the realization I had but the best I can say is, I have never seen anyone look at someone the way my brother in law looked at my sister when they shared some of their first moments with their baby. It was the love I witnessed there that showed me exactly what love is. It isn’t this single narrow road path people have painted because it is different for everyone. It is true when they say “you just know” because in that moment I just knew that they were perfect. I learned that it is a matter of give and take and compromise and courage and patience. It won’t always be easy but it should always be worth it.

6. What Being A Mother Means

Don’t get me wrong, I have the most amazing mother in the entire world and I mean that from the bottom of my heart. But just as I said above, I never knew a life without her love, so I never learned how it began. Now my sister has become a mother and I finally understand the unconditional love that accompanies it. Being a mother is not just about changing the diapers and feeding the baby, but showing your child a sort of love that only a mother can give. When she gets home, his eyes light up. When she holds him close, he snuggles in tighter. When she begins to sing, he is mesmerized. My sister learned from the best, and is now teaching me.