Most of us didn't choose to be this way in life. It's kind of just like our destiny; something we were thrusted into one day, and then again and again in different situations throughout our whole lives. I myself never set out the be "the peacemaker," but being a middle child I got a lot of experience growing up by bridging the gap; trying to bring rationality and understanding to every situation.
This isn't an easy position to be in in life. More often than not, we find ourselves stuck in the middle--not the one who's mad at someone, not the one who someone's mad at, but the one who somehow is managing to maintain friendships with both the conflicting parties, seeing both sides, understanding each person's points; somehow existing somewhere in between the two differing perspectives.
As the neutral third party whom both sides are confiding in, we're automatically expected to be the one to solve the problem. And this isn't always easy to do. And when we can't figure it out right away, we get stressed out. Because we're the peacemakers. It's our job to listen, understand, sympathize, propose a solution, provide instructions to both sides of the issue, and to see to it that the solution is carried out by both parties.
It is a blessing to be the peacemaker. It is lovely to be trusted. I love being vented to. I love when people trust me with their emotions. I love knowing what both people are thinking and getting to hear all sides of the story.
But as lovely as being the peacemaker is, it is incredibly frustrating and stressful at times. It is insanely difficult to try and convince a stubborn person to apologize. It is emotionally draining to provide constant support to someone who is suffering. It is painful to stare a friend in the face who is asking you for advice and to have to tell them you don't know what to do. Sometimes your friends or family will spring their conflict on you when you are already dealing with something personally, and it pushes you to your breaking point.
You only have so much energy to give.
But at the same time, you feel a responsibility and an obligation to provide. You can't shake the idea that you HAVE to do this.
Because if you don't, your siblings won't speak to each other or your friends will continue to be petty or something else will go wrong and you want so badly to prevent these conflicts, but you can't always prevent them.
And it always seems easier to solve other people's problems than your own. When you personally face a conflict with someone, you often have no idea what to do and you feel powerless and like you're not living up to your reputation.
But you keep pushing through.
You will always be this person; you will never stop being the peacemaker.
Because your door is truly always open.
Because when a friend says they need to vent, your answer will never be "no."
Because you will push your assignment that's due tomorrow to the side, in order to let your friend cry on your shoulder.
Because you will have the conversations that no one else is willing to have.
Because you will muster up all your energy to look your friend in the eye and tell them that they are wrong, hoping they will still be your friend afterwards.
Because that feeling of catharsis when your family members hug again or your friends agree to forgive and forget puts the happiest feeling in your heart.
You rarely get a thank you. Most of the time people don't even recognize it was you who ultimately solved the conflict.
But you know you did that.
Because it's your job.
And even when it stresses you out, you love your job.
