Most people who tell you to go to college, tell you to go so that you can get a degree and get a job that pays you good money. Although this holds true for many people, it leaves out some of the greatest benefits of college. Leaving the nest and exposing yourself to so many new things makes you learn more than you thought that you ever could know in four years. Some people are in college even longer than four years and I’m sure that they learn even more than what I’m about to share with you all.

1. There are a lot of responsibilities to living on your own and being independent.

When I moved into my residence hall, I thought that being independent just meant that I would get to make my own decisions and not have to tell anyone where I’m going. However, after not living with my family for four years, I’ve come to realize that there’s a lot more to it than that. There are so many bills that need to be paid, hard decisions that need to be made on your own, and a whole lot of cleaning. Of course, that’s only just the surface, but that gives you an idea.

2. Parents have given so much for you to be where you are in life.

Once you live on your own, you start to realize how much your parents really did for you when you were living with them. They paid all of your living expenses (food, bed, toys, utilities, etc), made sure that you didn’t do something to injure yourself (like trying to skateboard down a mountain), helped you to make really difficult decisions, were still there for you even when you claimed that you hated them, and they loved you throughout everything. That stuff is not easy. When you get a chance, thank them for everything that they did and still do.

3. Happiness is a choice.

This is a very abstract thought that I never considered before I came to college. I learned this from my experiences with people and a time in my life where I felt so down that I felt physically ill. This was a thought that was introduced to me while I was in this awful state after I decided to go to Cru (a Christian based organization). You can make just about anything into a negative thing if you choose to, but that works for happiness too. If something bad happens in your life, you can choose to dwell on it or you can choose to cry, move on, and think about all of the things in life that make you happy.

4. Loving yourself is needed to truly love others.

If you don’t love yourself, other people can tell. Your insecurities shine through and it makes others feel bad for you. If you start dating someone and you don’t love yourself, how are you supposed to know how to love them? You can’t give them your all if you don’t give enough to yourself.

5. Heartbreak is one of the worst feelings, but it doesn’t have to last forever.

I thought that I had my heart broken before I came to college, but it never got quite as broken as it did when I came to college. I dated someone for a year and a half and I thought that I was going to marry him. When he broke up with me, I felt feelings that I never thought that I could feel before. Heartbreak should not be taken lightly or seen as someone being dramatic. It’s real and it hurts worse than anything else that I’ve ever felt before. However, this doesn’t have to be a feeling that lasts forever. You can pull yourself out of this slump with the right attitude.

6. Romantic relationships are not the only kind of worthwhile relationship.

The first thought that comes to mind when you hear the word “relationship” is a romantic relationship. While these do exist, there are a ton of other relationships too, including friendships and relationships with your family. All of those relationships are needed so that you can feel whole. You can’t just foster a romantic relationship and forget about all of your other relationships. You have to balance your time and energy on your significant other with the other people who love you, like friends and family. It’s easy to get caught up in a romantic relationship, but your friends and family are the ones who will be there if things don’t work out with your significant other.

7. Some friends are temporary.

In high school, you may have a group of friends who you think that you’ll be friends with forever. However, once you move away from them, like for college, you’ll come to realize that those relationships take work. Some friends aren’t willing to put in the work to keep you as a friend, so they go away. This isn’t something to get bent up about because there are all kinds of wonderful people in this world who make great friends and who are willing to put in the effort.

8. People can grow apart.

College is a time in life where people can either grow immensely or stay just the same. Some can even get worse if they make the wrong decisions. This can happen at any point in life, but I point out college specifically because, for many people, this is the first time that they can actually make their own decisions. This is something that you have to be cautious of, especially when you get into romantic relationships. You have to make sure that you’re growing together before you make the decision to spend the rest of your life with that person.

9. Having an open mind will educate you more than anything else.

If you have a closed mind, then your opinion will stay the same and you will only learn about the things that you already know. If you open up your mind, you might hear a life-altering opinion that could make your beliefs in life become completely different. I have become a much higher quality human being by keeping an open mind and learning or doing things that I may not necessarily enjoy learning or doing. This also helps to improve all kinds of relationships because you’re supporting beliefs with an open mind, rather than combating those beliefs with a closed mind. I’m not saying that you can’t combat other people’s beliefs if you truly don’t believe in it, I’m just telling you to make sure that you’re keeping an open mind about it.

10. Judging other people only closes you off to the most amazing people who you could ever meet.

This goes along with having a closed mind. If you judge someone based on what you hear from other people or what they’re wearing, you may be cutting yourself off from meeting one of the most amazing people who you could ever meet. A lot of times, people have stories about other people based on the stories that they hear from random people. These stories are often untrue or very biased. Make your own decisions about other people through your own experience with them. That way, you don’t cut yourself off from really great human beings.

11. Hard work pays off.

I kind of learned this before college, but I never truly felt the impact of this until I came to college. Let me explain this to you as simply as possible: college is hard. It’s really hard. You get a lot of homework, you have to study for exams, you have to deal with unfavorable professors and adjuncts, and you have to fight for lasting relationships with people. However, if you put in that effort, you will eventually get to bask in the benefits. I didn’t truly start seeing this until my junior year of college. I worked my butt off and, finally, I started getting scholarships and internships in my field of study. I felt more confident than I had ever felt before. Now, I’m going to get the opportunity to work for my favorite company in one of the most amazing places on the planet: Disney World.

12. If one thing doesn’t work out, something else will.

When one door closes, another door opens. This semester, I applied to go on a networking trip to New York City to meet some prestigious companies. I was turned down to go on this networking trip, I later found out that I was accepted to work at Disney World, which is something that I wanted even more. Don’t get too bent up over an opportunity closing because that just means that there’s a new opportunity waiting around the corner.

Finally, after spending four years at an amazing university, I can stand here and tell you that I am a completely new and improved individual. I’ll be changing forever, but what I learned in college gave me a solid foundation to feel confident of, no matter what direction the wind takes me after I graduate in May. College isn’t just about the degree, it’s about improving your quality of life and learning how to make it on your own.