Everyone has their own preference when it comes to beer; some good, some... not so good. What kind of beer you choose determines how most people judge you while drinking. Let's take a look at the starting lineup.
Bud Light. You're the kind of person who settles for something instead of actually getting something that you want. You probably went to the store looking at the beer section for about 20 minutes and just decided to get Bud Light because the options were freaking you out. You're also not a girl because girls don't want to waste calories drinking something that tastes like a watered down fountain drink from yesterday's midnight McDonalds run.
Yuengling. You are the manliest, most well respected bro of the drinking community. The last thing you do in any situation is settle. If I come up to you at a party and you're drinking a Yuengling, I will be automatically forced to hang out with you. Enough said.
Mike's Hard Lemonade. If I see a man drinking a Mike's Hard, I will be forced to think that you spend your nights dying your hair and watching The Notebook while crying your eyes out. Because that's probably what you do... every night. If you're a girl, you probably drink it and use the excuse that it has more percentage of alcohol than regular beer. In which case, you're probably watching The Notebook with that guy who was drinking it as well.
Redd's Ale. You're probably a guy who likes the taste of Mike's Hard, but doesn't want to drink it because of reasons stated above. You're drinking this because you think people will not say anything about it, but it's quite obvious what you're doing. The sweet taste of Redd's will literally make you sick after three or four beers because there's an immense amount of sugar in each bottle. I don't understand why people like this beer at all. It literally saddens me. If you're a girl drinking this, that's fine... I guess. Just don't ask me to finish it because you realized how much sugar is in it in the middle of your sip.
Corona/Modelo/Dos Equis. The classiest of people I know will drink this with a lime and have a casual poker game with their friends while smoking Cuban cigars. If you don't drink this kind of beer with lime, you're probably someone who puts the milk in before their cereal. In other words, you can't be trusted. If you have been confronted with a case of Mexican beer, you better not even think about taking a sip of that beer until limes are in your possession.
Heineken. I feel like I have only seen dads drink this beer. It's not something college students drink because it's pretty expensive and it makes you look like an ass while everyone else is drinking Natty Light from a keg that was tapped about three hours ago.
Natty Light. You're in a fraternity and drink it because it's the cheapest thing on the market right now. Normally it's drank out of a keg, but if you buy a case of Natty Light, you have really hit rock bottom. Not only did you have a plethora of options that would have been better, but you just simply did not want to spend one or two more dollars to get something that doesn't taste like tap water that's been sitting in your car's cupholder for about a week.
If you bring a beer that isn't listed in one of these categories, I'm just going to assume that you know what you're doing when it comes to beer. If I haven't heard of the beer before, it's safe to say that it probably is way too expensive for me and probably tastes like I should be drinking on a Yacht with a bunch of rich and old, stubborn white men.
