Going to college anywhere we all know the struggle of feeling like a fish out of water. For me that experienced entailed attending my first choice, first acceptance school; which just so happened to be a private liberal arts college 2 1/2 hours north east of where I lived in Atlanta, Georgia. It's definitely been a jarring experience from the start. Let me name several things that I've noticed being a low income first generation student that I feel are pretty universal.
The Money
At least with my university it was no secret that everyone who went here got a scholarship. Most also had loans which felt like a relatable thing for me. Frankly to see anyone with money is a surprising thing, but especially for those that seem to have an endless amount. It makes it seem like they're rich when they supposedly aren't. This may be from a different situation like a divorce where the money is coming from two incomes, but still. It's easy to feel bothered when you're the only one who doesn't have an allowance of 50 plus dollars. It's partially the reason you might not have as many opportunities to hang out with friends if they're going to a restaurant or shopping and you don't have anything to contribute constantly.
You can't join a sorority because you don't have the money, you may end up spending all of your birthday or holiday money on textbooks, and the last thing you want is for someone who couldn't relate to feel sorry for you.
The Expectations
When others talk about how they don't know what they want to do with their degree, how they'll find a job, or what they'll major in you can't quite relate because it was a huge triumph for you to get to university at all and you had to come with a set plan. This doesn't mean you had all of your classes for every semester mapped out already, but still. When others talk about constantly skipping classes and partying every weekend it's strange for you because you're paying for your education more directly. When people have mentioned to me stories about their parents not caring for their major or being disappointed in their choice I can't relate, because my mom didn't finish technical school and my dad got his GED. So they're just really impressed that I'm going to college in the first place. Of course they know that I'm talented and have a plan, but still. It's a whole different world and mindset. First generation parents want you to succeed especially because of all you risk with loans to get to university, but they don't have the privilege that makes it so being unhappy with your decisions occurs. This isn't always true of course, sometimes it means a lot more to parents who haven't gone onto secondary education for students to major in something that stereotypically will make them money. Nevertheless, the expectations differ.
The Distance
Most everyone at college will be living on campus which means they're away from home. Most won't be close by and some will be from other states and even other countries. If you're a first generation student who didn't have much money growing up chances are this is your first time leaving home. There weren't summer camps and big away trips for you. This means going away for college can even more of a change from your normal life. This was especially true for me when I left for college, because I was leaving home for the first time and moving to an entirely new city that was much bigger than my own. No one from home or school previously being there. I was the only part of home that I had. Sure there's always your stuff, and you can somewhat make your room homey. But at the end of the day, it's just you. Especially if your parents can't afford to visit often and you can only go home for the holidays. It's a really jarring feeling that hits you hard and you don't expect it.
The Experience
Study abroad is expensive for everyone. However for students who are the first in their family to go to college, it isn't as much of a possibility as for others. For a good bit of students it's a question of where more so than a matter of if. It's valued as an integral part of any university experience but it feels problematic when universities act as if the problem of if would be the parents' simply not seeing the point. As if the money is just stashed somewhere. For a good bit of people it would be, but for another good bit it isn't as if their parents are somehow not seeing the point of studying abroad or maliciously keeping that away from their children. Luckily, my university makes it seem at least semi attainable with the tuition not being paid again for partner universities and scholarships being available. Still, it's a daunting sight. When you could only go on one trip if at all the alternative breaks, and 2 week breaks, don't look better exactly than an entire semester and either way it's more than you've ever possessed money wise.
One doesn't always feel like the odd one out at university and can of course find plenty of common ground with friends who are more well off than them and with parents who have a more educated background, however a lot of the time it can be hard to miss the differences. It's important to remember that you're here for a reason, because you deserve it. You've earned this and should take advantage of every second of it. Work hard whoever you are and whatever your background it. It's going to be difficult and chances are it has been but it'll be so worth it in the end.
