To all my gays:
People judge. People judge by just the look of someone, but when you say "I'm gay," they judge even harder. Six months ago I was shocked hearing my friend was gay. I honestly had no idea, but did I care? Not a bit.
Having a gay best friend has taught me more about not only the LGBTQ community, but about life in general. It's such a sensitive and uncomfortable topic to be talked about in our society. Let's be honest, I've had comments said to me like "Be careful, she might turn you!" or "you're friends with a lesbian?" and that's the ignorance speaking. Straight up, I love having a best friend that's a lesbian.
My best friend is so confident. Her confidence has truly helped me with mine. Surrounding yourself with confident people is healthy. Her confidence and positive attitude has helped me learn that it doesn't matter what others think about you, but what you think of yourself. In a judgmental society, having confidence is hard. I've struggled with it, and I know she has - but she's just herself. That's what having a gay best friend has taught me.
I've learned how rude the word "gay" is. I've said "that's gay" more than I can count. It's not an appropriate word to use. How many other words can you use instead of gay? I'm pretty sure there's thousands of other words to use that don't offend people. I'm guilty of this and still trying to catch myself when I say it. That's what having a gay best friend has taught me.
My friend Nicole has taught me the importance of humor. I give her such a hard time about dates and watching her go on dates - it's funny because it's so different to me. It's okay to laugh and recognize that you'll never see eye-to-eye on sex. She likes girls, and I like boys - plain and simple. One time she told me that someone thought we were dating and I laughed so hard I cried. Just because you're friends with someone that is gay, doesn't mean you are! I'm straighter than a piece of paper, and she's reppin' rainbows everyday.
I've doubled my friends because of her, grown confidence because of her, and just have taken things and comments so light-hearted than ever before. People judge, it's a given, but it's being confident in your own skin that's important.
I suggest to all my readers that although you may not be comfortable being around the gay community, that you don't judge. Love is love - you don't have to agree with anything, but you don't have the right to judge. I've learned that lesson. I use to judge and be uncomfortable, and 20 years later I've decided that whether your heterosexual or homosexual, you're a human just like everyone else. My best friend Nicole is the most generous, self-less, confident, and most beautiful person I have ever met - and I am so incredibly lucky to call her one of my best friends.
Thanks for teaching important life lessons, Nicole. I can't wait to see where life takes you next. Rainbows for life!
-Claire