Everybody is different. What I mean is- everybody responds to criticism in different ways, and this distinctive behavior begins in early childhood.
What I have found through personal experience is that there are a few different types of coaches. The main three that I have come into contact with are those who act as a dictator, those who act as a babysitter, and those who actually do their job-which is to teach. Here’s why the controlling, dictator-like coach is the worst:
Through this style of coaching, the coach makes all of the decisions. It is the role of the player to listen and adhere to the demands of the coach. The coach has a wealth of knowledge regarding the sport, but seldom do they share this knowledge with their team.
On the surface, this doesn’t seem terrible. Every team needs an organized leader, as well as discipline. So where is the problem?
The problem, lies in the morale of the individual players and also the team as a whole. If you have this coach, during practice, you will not be offered suggestion or constructive criticism of any kind. Some players will be told that what they did was “good”, but you will be left wondering what the coach thinks of your performance. And when you are placed on the bench for an entire game, you will have no idea what you have done wrong- because you were never told.
All this leads to is decreased self-esteem, which for some, is difficult to recover. If a coach does not seem to have any faith in you, why should you have any faith in yourself? This spiral of hopelessness only worsens, because the coach never tells you how you can improve, even when you ask.
So you’re left with a sport that you used to love but that you now dread. Practices and games are now your stresser, when they used to be your stress-reliever. You’re always on edge because you know that what you’re doing isn’t good enough, but you don’t know how to make it better. Nobody is showing you, and now, you dislike this game so much that you don’t even care.
When you’re feeling this way, you most likely want to discuss this with a teammate, seeing as they could be experiencing the same thing. However, this isn’t always possible. With a coach that never puts emphasis on the normal bond that a team should develop, teammates aren’t always friends. Sometimes, they’re enemies, and everyone feels alone.
Ideally, bad coaches would either decide to stop coaching or reevaluate their coaching methods. Realistically, though, they will probably always exist. The most effective way to combat this is to remember that even though your coach has authority, they are only one person. One person cannot negate the successes you have had in your sport thus far, and they cannot impede on the successes that you will have in the future (as long as you keep them out of your head).
