So, you've finally finished your first year at college. You realize, as you're packing up your room and wondering how you ever moved everything in, that you're actually going to miss your school and the people you met there. After you've said some heartfelt—maybe even tearful—goodbyes to your new friends that you never thought you'd make during the first week, it hits you: you have an entire summer to spend with your friends from home! The excitement inside you can hardly be contained on your packed car ride home as you reminisce on all of the crazy, funny, exciting times you had during high school. Sure, you've followed your friends' lives via Twitter and Instagram, but it's nothing compared to all of the memories you made with countless sleepovers and sneaking out to parties late-night adventuring together.
The absolute second you're done unpacking your belongings into your old bedroom you send a text to your friends saying something along the lines of being home and needing to hang out ASAP. You set your phone down to finish putting everything back in their familiar spots while waiting for everyone to reply. When you finally get done and check your phone, you find that you don't have any plans; everyone was either busy, still at school, or hadn't replied. You think nothing of this of course, you'll get to see everyone eventually—what's one night at home alone? Your family has missed you, and you've missed them, so you're excited to spend the night with them. It's not until you've been home for so long that you've actually binge-watched every series you've ever thought about watching on Netflix that you notice it; you're friendships from high school are completely different. If you've experienced this, like me, you've probably seen the three different types of friends-from-high-school.
The Social Media Friend
You know this friend, we ALL know this friend. You've kept in touch during your Freshman year and still constantly share Facebook posts with each other, post hilarious #tbt pictures on Instagram, and tweet at least once a month about how much you miss this friend. To everyone else, it appears that you're still BFFs, but you never actually see this friend. Every time you and The Social Media Friend try to hang out, one of you has to work or go to a cousin's graduation party or has a summer class to attend. This is understandable and almost inevitable. Your schedules are not the same like they were in high school; summer becomes less about relaxing and laying out all day with your friends and more about earning and saving money for the upcoming school year. In the end, you'll hang out with this friend a few rare times when neither of you are busy. It's not the same friendship you shared in high school, but hey, everyone loves a good Timehop photo.
The Ghost Friend
You're not quite sure if this friend dropped off the face of the earth or not (aside from watching their Snapchat stories and still following them on Twitter). Maybe you hung out a few times during spring break or one of the few weekends you were both home from school, but now that you're home for the summer The Ghost Friend did exactly that: ghosted. Sending them a text usually results in you wondering if they never read the text or if they just turned their Read Receipts off. They almost never answer your texts, which would have never happened in high school. Thinking about the last time you hung out, you remember the conversation mainly revolving around rumors about people from your graduating class or laughing about old memories that aren't as funny as they once were. This Ghost Friendship probably resulted from both of you changing when you took different paths after graduation. It stings a little when this friend pops up on your Timehop with happy memories, but it's probably for the best that they ignore your texts. People change and they may not be the same person you were friends with in high school.
The Friend Who Grew With You
This is the friend that miraculously stayed in your life. Somehow you both managed to stop being so childish mature once you got to college. The more amazing part is that you both matured into people who still wanted to be friends. Now, you're probably thinking "Wait, didn't this article start by saying your home friends are different after high school?" And you'd be right, but this friendship isn't the same as it was in high school. You and The Friend Who Grew spend less time focused on stupid drama and he-said-she-said rumors and are more about just keeping each other company and keeping each other sane. Instead of hanging out every second of every day, you see each other late at night after long shifts. Instead of getting dressed up and going out, you stay in to watch movies and eat ice cream. You don't do everything together like you used to because you both have different responsibilities to handle, but that doesn't mean you aren't still friends. It's a different kind of friendship since you both have grown up.
Growing up is the part of life that we all look forward to at a young age, but never really understand what it means until we've done it ourselves. We all wish away our high school years and talk about what we want to be when we grow up without thinking about the consequences that come with it and how irreversible it is. You may lose some friends along the way, but you'll also gain friends, and you'll wonder how you ever lived without them. The biggest part is remembering that everyone changes, including you, and that's okay. Maybe that friend from high school that is, metaphorically speaking, still stuck in high school, was only your friend when you saw them eight hours a day, five days a week, for an entire school year. Maybe they weren't supposed to make it to the next chapter of your life because it turns out you literally have nothing in common. If you're still friends with all of your high school friends, then consider yourself lucky. If you're not, try to end it on a good note so that you can still look back fondly on all the memories you had together.
