Stepping into the real word and putting my big girl pants on, I’ve looked around and started to sense a trend with our society.
A trend that in the past, I myself had also been guilty of. If you look around long enough you'll begin to see, the moment we’re riding high on our accomplishments and success it’s all about ourselves.
I did this. I accomplished this. I worked my butt off for that 4.0, or I earned that pay raise. And in those few moments of glory, it is like we expect the world to roll out its red carpet for us and get out the marching band to celebrate our achievement.
But what happens when we hit rock bottom? What happens when we get rejected or make a mistake?Is it still all about me?
Did I loose my scholarship because I did not make my education a priority? Did I half ass my responsibilities at my job so I didn’t get that raise like everyone else?
Because it seems to me that the I, Me, My act isn't as appealing when the tables have turned.
We have become the masters of the “finger-pointing” art of manipulation, I myself included. Nothing is ever our fault. If we did not get that raise, it is because our bosses did not like us or because they pick favorites. If we did not make the grade we needed, it is because the professor did not teach it or it ‘was not' on the syllabus. If we made a mistake, it is almost always because someone else set us up. If we're down and out, it's because we were raised that way. We trade our glamorous red carpet and big, boisterous band for flaming fires and sharpened pitch forks. We have created this mind set that has brain washed us into believing the only reason we could ever be on the bottom is because someone else pinned us down there…. When in reality we tripped and fell there ourselves.
After a habit of blaming others for my short comings, the day came when I had no where to point my finger but in the mirror. And in that moment I really began to question what makes it so darn difficult to fess up to our shortcomings, our mistakes, and our down falls. Is it really that much of a blow to egos if we aren't always perfect? What happens when we have to admit we were wrong? Does the Earth begin to crumble into a million pieces as all of its volcanos erupt simultaneously and ranging winds and rains sweep you up in the midst of your downfall? Are you stamped forever is history as the human being (gasp) who made that one mistake and can never be right ever again? I'm sorry but I'm going to have to call BS on that one.
Fellow products of the finger-pointing generation, hear me out. I promise you that you aren't helping yourself when you decide it's best to avoid taking responsibility for your actions. If anything, by avoiding responsibility you're avoiding growth. Mistakes and shortcomings are how we as human beings, who are anything but perfect, learn and grow into more mature and successful individuals. How are we going to know how to not make that one mistake again, or how to approach certain situations successfully if we constantly make it someone else's problem? Because at the end of the day, they can't take responsibility for our actions and they can't grow from it either. Only we can.
So if you bomb that test, forget that bill payment, wreck that car, get rejected for that position, loose that friend, fail to remember that important date, or any of the messed up things you're probably going to do, brush those shoulders off, say "my bad, won't happen again," and take it in stride. Because life is too short for pity parties, my friend.