Timothy Piazza and I were the same age and grew up less than thirty minutes apart in New Jersey. Our high schools were rivals in football. We've had mutual friends on Facebook. We both rushed in the Spring of 2017. The only difference is I lost my ID on my bid night...Tim Piazza lost his life
SEE ALSO: Why Can't Greek Life Stop Hazing? Everyone Else Can.
What happened to the 19-year old sophomore was not only tragic, but it was completely preventable. As a result, Beta Theta Pi, the fraternity that Piazza was intending to "rush" (a term that Greek life no longer uses because of its association with hazing), has been permanently banned from Penn State's campus, and 18 former brothers are being brought up on criminal charges, including hazing and involuntary manslaughter. Penn State has also taken some serious actions by unleashing a strict set of restrictions and rules for active chapters for this upcoming year.
When horrible things happen, the first thing people do is try to find a reason why. Why did this poor kid die? Why didn't anyone call 911 until 12 hours after he originally fell down a flight of stairs? Then, the blame game begins. Penn State, Greek life in general, fraternities, and alcohol have all been blamed as contributors to Tim Piazza's death.
As horrible as this story is, I don’t think that blaming Penn State’s Greek life and the so-called "drinking culture" is the way to properly address this issue. The purpose of being in a Greek organization is to foster and establish friendships, as well as have the chance to take on leadership opportunities. Hazing and rushing seem to go hand in hand, and I don't think that is fair. The truth is, some fraternities haze, but for every one that does, there are more that don't.
You can't generalize every member of Greek life in every college across America as being people who support hazing when in reality, only a very small percentage of people (not organizations) haze. People take it too far, people think they’re invincible, and their egos inflate at an alarming rate, but this isn’t exclusive to Greek life. (Sayreville, NJ football hazing scandal, anyone?) The truth is, hazing occurs in all walks of life. It is no longer exclusive to fraternity pledges chugging cheap vodka to “fit in” with the older, beer-gutted brethren they are quite literally dying to be a part of. Hazing is not about drinking or physically hurting someone, it is about instilling fear into a person, so much so that they are willing to trust and believe anything you say.
So, who is to blame for Tim Piazza dying on Beta Theta Pi’s bid acceptance night? That's a question that's up for a jury to decide, not a college girl who writes Odyssey articles.
However, I believe that this death and all the events that led up to it does not simply fall on one person, or even eighteen people. In a way, it falls on all of us—Greek life or not, Penn State or not.
Think about it. How many times have you been at a party at your respective college and seen someone who was falling all over themselves, or unable to keep their eyes open, or throwing up everywhere? Did you try and help them? If you saw Tim Piazza face down at the bottom of Beta Theta Pi’s steps, would you help him? Would you be scared to say something to the president or the pledge master, or even the guy standing next to you? The truth is, things like this happen at every school, even if it’s someone drinking themselves into a stupor without anyone else hazing them. Is drinking culture to blame? Maybe, but it's deeper than that. Waiting 12 hours before calling for help—despite a brother saying in the fraternity's GroupMe that "Tim Piazza might be a problem...he's going to need help" and another screaming for his brothers to call 911—is not drinking culture, it's bystander culture. This definitely doesn't represent Greek life. This is a tragic story of how fear and being a bystander can literally kill someone.
I would love to go the rest of my life without hearing a story like Tim Piazza’s. He was someone’s son, someone’s brother, someone’s teammate, and someone’s friend. Wouldn’t you want someone to help out your son, your brother, your teammate, your friend? Would you stand there judging a drunk girl puking, or would you make sure she got home safely?
My favorite quote is “be the change you wish to see in the world," and I live that day in and day out. Be the person who makes sure the drunk girl you met in the bathroom got home safely. Be the one who makes sure the frat brother you know from Psych class who's been drunk since the pregame is okay, or hand him off to a sober brother who will. Anyone could have been Tim Piazza that night, so it’s on everyone else to make sure it doesn’t keep happening.
