Coming into this, there are probably a select few that truly understand what it means to be pansexual. Unfortunately, a lot of individuals don't really know much about the subject. So many people have preconceived ideas of it because they don't educate themselves.
Well, if you have no idea what the word means, today is your lucky day. Of course, a lot of folks can define it slightly different ways. It all really depends on how a person feels.
One of my best friends identifies as pansexual. Julia Steinhour, 22, LGBTQ+ advocate and owner of pride-focused Etsy shop 'MadMatterMatrix,' joined me for an interview at Balboa Park.
Prior to the interview, I did know a lot about pansexuality, but I wanted to educate the world with someone who had done more of the research and truly understood what it really means to be pansexual. In this interview, Steinhour gives some insight on her sexual orientation, as well as advice on coming out and truly loving oneself.
Without further ado, here is that interview.
I would like to be begin by asking you how you would define 'pansexuality?'
Pansexuality is basically loving the whole spectrum of LGBT+ but also loving any gender or even those without a gender. You can even fall in love with straight people.
Honestly, the way I like to see it is, well, I am more of a personality person. If you have a personality that meshes well with mine, the way you see or identify yourself, I have no problem with. With pansexuality, there is a wide range of people that you can be in interest of. There's so much more options for you.
A common misconception of being pansexual is that you are attracted to actual pans, like kitchenware. Can we please put that to rest for good?
No! I don't have sex with my kitchen! I am not attracted to pans, if anything, more spoons.
Ha, no. I've heard that joke so many times. It's stereotypical. Pansexuality does not mean in any way that you love or make love to a pan.
If you could make love to Peter Pan, that's a different story.
I feel like people classify it in that way, because they don't take the time to understand it.
Of course. They don't do their research. They just assume.
So how did you come to realize that you were pansexual?
It's been long time since I've really figured out who I am. Since middle school, even back to elementary school, I was bi-curious. By the time high school came around, I was like 'You know what, it's been a long time. I do like girls. I do like guys. I'm obviously bisexual."
By the time I figured out what pansexuality meant, I was in love with Steam Powered Giraffe, a band from San Diego that I've been super interested in since early high school. The main person of the trio is transgender. I had no idea when I first discovered the band.
When the person started going through the hormonal changes and took the steps to become who they really are, throughout the entire process of coming out and then finally transitioning, I realized, I love this person. Even before, even after. There was nothing that turned me off or changed for me.
I was confused about where that left me. Would I still be classified as bisexual?
It was on Tumblr that I found the term 'pansexual.' It showed more of a spectrum to me. It wasn't all black and white. I did my research and I thought, "Oh my god. This sounds about right." There were people on Tumblr who weren't afraid to show their true colors. I followed people who were gender-fluid and people who were genderless. They were still really attractive to me.
If they didn't fall under boy or girl, then how is that bisexuality?
Pansexuality felt more right to me.
What's your advice to someone who may be pansexual and they don't know how to come out or express who they are?
Well, this goes for however you identify, whether it be pansexual, gay, bi, demisexual, take the time to get to know who you are first. I know there are people in this world that really want to have a relationship. They want someone to love. It goes with straight people too, but especially with those coming out and being who they are.
You have to go through the process of discovering yourself. If you go right into a relationship then you are spending your time knowing the other person and not yourself. It's gonna take time to get to know who you are as a person. When you take that time then it'll be worth so much when you come out.
No matter what there will be people who love you no matter what and there will be people who hate you because they don't understand.
My advice is to get rid of the people who bring you down. They'll make you feel guilty and think that this isn't who you should be. Those people will always make you feel like shit.
Listen, you only get one life on this planet. You have to live it in a way where you will be happy no matter what you are. As long as you are you and you accept yourself, people around you will accept you too. Even if your own family doesn't, there will be someone that loves you for you.
Wow, thank you for all that. I don't have anymore questions. I guess, I could just ask you for a closing statement?
For those who identify as pansexual, congratulations. For those who plan on coming out as pansexual, I'm so proud of you. For those of you still in the closet, I'm rooting for you.
Pansexuality has grown so much more over the years because people have gotten to know it more, they've done their research and they're coming out. I couldn't be prouder.
For the longest time, I felt like I was the only one. Over the years I've seen and met so many people who identify as other things and I am so proud of each and every one of them. You don't to come out right now but know that you will be so much happier with yourself.
It doesn't matter if you are gay, bi, pansexual, lesbian and everything in-between, be proud to be out, be proud to be LGBTQ+ and know you who are. Don't let anyone give you shit for it. That's all I gotta say.
Hopefully, this interview was a lot of help in informing everyone of pansexuality. I also hope that anyone still confused can take the steps to educate themselves.
Luckily, pansexuality is starting to be talked about more. There are public figures like Miley Cyrus who identify as pansexual. There are so many pansexual characters in media like Marvel's Deadpool, Eliot from Syfy's "The Magicians," Rick from "Rick and Morty" and the list goes on.
I hope to give people more of an understanding for each part of the LGBTQIAP and I encourage everyone to ask questions and do your research.