What does happiness look like?

Happiness. It’s what life is all about. It’s the motive behind all of our actions and what we spend our entire life chasing. But sometimes, life gets the best of us and happiness becomes something we no longer know how to attain. There’s one question many of us yearn to understand: How do you find a happiness that is ever-present? One that doesn’t rely on outside sources or false senses of validation? One that is eternal and that comes from within?

I’m here to tell you what happiness looks like.

Happiness looks like having your own back. It looks like setting your own standards and being unapologetically you. It looks like making decisions and not questioning yourself. Happiness is calling your own shots and not caring what anyone thinks.

Happiness looks like not getting everything you want. As we grow older, we meet people with the nicest cars, houses and jobs. Some are happy and some are the most miserable, unfulfilled two-dimensional people we’ve ever met. This is because happiness does not come from an outside source, it comes from within. If you always look toward the next new thing in life, you will never be content and happy. Once the excitement about whatever it is you were after fades, you will look toward the next best thing, always failing to see the value of what’s in front of your eyes. It is a cycle that will leave you feeling empty, not happy.

Happiness is not convincing yourself that you’re asking for too much. Everything you want and are looking for is out there. Never ever lower your standards or expectations so you can finally be “happy.” I promise you will find exactly what it is that you are looking for if you stay true to yourself and what you want.

Happiness is not ignorance. Happiness is about fully acknowledging and accepting the truth for what it is. The truth is always liberating, and pretending to ignore what you know is the truth will leave you disappointed. The truth will allow you to stop being fooled by people’s words and only see who they are through their actions. This will allow you to call quits on the BS and move on with dignity and pride.

Happiness is not about other people; it is about you. Happiness cannot be found at the bar inside of your fourth cup of vodka cranberry. It cannot be found in that next hot guy or girl. It cannot be found by making others feel small just so you can feel tall. Stop looking for happiness by seeking out false senses of validation. Nothing and no one will make you feel happy but yourself. Surrounding yourself with those who love and accept you for who you truly are can add to your already present happiness though!

Happiness costs absolutely nothing. Happiness should never come at the cost of abandoning your self-respect and gut feelings. Happiness is about following that and not being sorry for doing so. Don't spend your money on things thinking that it will bring you happiness. Trust yourself and your inner voice. It will guide you to great places.

Happiness is simple. Love yourself, be true to yourself, surround yourself with those who value you and be done with those who don’t. Have healthy boundaries and set your own standards. You are the captain of your own ship and you call the shots.

And always remember, fate loves the fearless. I believe in you!