Think back to when AOL Instant Messenger, or better known as AIM, was our go-to form of communication. Heck, it foreshadowed iMessage, Facebook message, and even Twitter DMs. But what is one without an intricate screen name and an AIM profile inspired by Buddy4U? Let's not forget the endless pages of icons we could have chosen (mine may or may not have been a gif of brown hair flowing in the wind stating brunette 4 life at one point or another). But hold up, AIM profiles and icons aside, we had one huge choice to make upon the creation of our infamous AIM accounts--the screen name. Better pick something good or else you may be the laughing stock of the 5th grade. Hopefully this will trigger some memories for you and help you learn a little bit more about your tween self.
Discretion: All screen names are in fact real and were once in use; please refrain from too much laughter.
1. You had an animal reference.
Examples: Llamagirl24 // doggydude500 // beaglelover1995 // krpmonkey
So you wanted everyone to know you loved puppies, kitties, or llamas (?). That's cute. Maybe you didn't even like those pets, but you wanted people to believe that you did. It's all about that first impression. Just make sure that you have a cute icon to match. Looking back on it now, it seems a little ridiculous, but hey, you just wanted people to know you liked those little furry creatures.
2. You wanted everyone to know what sport you played, what sport you liked, or wanted people to think you liked sports.
Examples: vballbabe488 // soccerrocker20 // yankeechick25 // kkdancer007
You may have been the starting quarterback on your undefeated middle school football team or you may have played left bench like no other, but hey, no one would know if you made a kick a$$ screen name about sports, right? Heck, you may not have even liked the sport you played, but what better disguise than making your AIM identity one that presented you as future 'most athletic' in your high school yearbook. Don't forget those sports fan screen names--Derek Jeter, Tom Brady, and Kobe Bryant definitely took note of those.
3. You just HAD to throw an x or xo in there (or 7).
Examples: xdanielleyx12 // X0bittersweet0xo // olearyx11 // PAiGEx33
I don't think I'll ever understand the purpose of the bajillion xo and x in a screen name. Is it that much of a barrier from the bulk of your screen name that you needed to include 400? Did you need everyone to know that you are all about those hugs and kisses, or was your original BRILLIANT username taken, so you added a few (hundred)? Let's just say if you had a billion of these, we'd label you as real lovable... or unoriginal, take your pick.
4. You had a name pun.
Examples: wheelBARROWx338 // fowlprey12 // ellephantx0x // sweetcar0line33
Let's just say your humor started at age 11. You wanted to outwit all of your buddies, so you made a clever screen name with your name. People clearly knew who you were by what SN you picked, but they were definitely envious. Everyone else just stared at their desktop computers thinking, "Why didn't I think of something like that?" You probably can still think on your feet and use your wit on the regular. Round of applause for you.
5. The word *beach* or a similar summer term was mentioned at least once.
Examples: beachbum24 // bikinibeachbabe9
Summer is your season and the beach is your place. There was no doubt your AIM profile quote was probably an artsy version of : ~life's a beach, I'm just playing in the sand :* [insert palm tree symbol from Microsoft Word Webdings font] You were always relaxed and ready for anything, and let's not forget your color scheme on your profile was most likely blues, greens, light pinks, and pale yellows.
6. You wanted everyone to know some sort of key attribute about you.
Examples: machoman87 // chickmagnet4lyfe [Gronk's former screen name, no lie] // lildevil5230 // lilangel5230
Maybe you were going to be that 7th grader everyone knew as the one with the muscles, or you were the one who had six girlfriends by the second marking period of sixth grade, or you had a little angel or devil side to you. Whatever it was, you most likely had one key characteristic that you wanted all of your buddies to know about you, and you let them know alright. What better way to make it clear than by seeing it the second they added you on AIM? You liked the attention and you wanted people to know who you were. I hope you supported your screen name with a little picture icon evidence or a relevant quote in your profile--then you knew it was legit.
7. You were boring.
Examples: daniellef12 // emmaB42 // mattdf87
You didn't want to be funny or clever or cute, you literally just wanted AIM for the purpose of communicating. You went the captain obvious route and did not even think twice about it. Maybe you were a little boring, or simply just practical.
8. You have no explanation.
Examples: ovaltine95 // sparkleannie8 // noodledoodle67 // spongiefreak // cupcakelvrx12
You literally have no explanation for your screen name, it just HUZZAH, came to you. You're a free bird and you have more confidence than anyone. Who cares how weird or bizarre it sounds? It's different, yeah it's different, but that was the goal! You're just happy you found a screen name that was available on the first try.
So we may not IM each other with ridiculous usernames anymore, and AIM is now associated with the Dinosaur Age, but if these former screen names taught us anything, it's what Twitter/Instagram usernames to NOT use. Like they say, less is more! At least we can look back at ourselves and laugh.... or regret our bizarre choices and wish we n3v3r t@lk3d L!k3 +h!$ ~
special note: tysm to my friends // sorority sista sistas for the use of their screen names.
~*UKWUR*~
