We've All Been Are A Villain | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Adulting

We've All Been Are A Villain

Own it. Apologize. Be Better.

7
We've All Been Are A Villain

We're not perfect. We're all a little good. And a little not so good. A dash of Ying. A pinch of Yang. Part good wolf. Part bad wolf. You get it, right? We all have those in us; just as much as we can be good, we can also be bad. Who is responsible for the bad just as much as the good? The person looking back at you in the mirror. At times, we have a tough time owning it. I know I do. Owning it is half of the battle. The other half is making a change.

It can be challenging to think that just as much as I have toxic people in my life, I most likely was ( and will be ) a villain in someone else's life. I am guilty of that. Even though I wish I could be the hero in every person's book that I've been a part of, the fact is - I'm not. I've definitely made some special guest appearances as "Poison Ivy" or "Harley Quinn". Whether it was (or will be) intentional or unintentional, we're all guilty of being the villain at some point in our lives.

I need to own up to the stories where I've been a villain. Apologize for it. And use those experiences to change for the better.

We all have the good and bad in us. Sometimes the good wins and other times, the bad wins. For me, I kept feeding the bad wolf for quite sometime and I came to place where I looked in the mirror and didn't recognize who I was turning into. I did not like the person that was looking back at me. That is when I realized I had to make changes to help the good win more often than the bad. Now don't get it twisted - it doesn't mean that I'm all good all the time. There will be days where I'm not the most pleasant and I may play the villain (just ask my mom).

I wish I could say that I will never be the villain again but I would probably be lying to you and myself. I'm human and make mistakes on the daily (again, just ask my mom). Even though I'd like to think I'm a good person, it doesn't mean that I haven't had bumps on my path. And it also doesn't mean that I won't make mistakes again. It means that for some, when they think of me, it isn't all flowers and Rosé. Although I wish I could go back to every villain-ness part I've played and redo the moment - I can't.

But if it wasn't for falling down and realizing, "I am what I'm running away from", I wouldn't have grown as much as I have. I would be at a character standstill: staying the same chapter after chapter.

Try not to look at your mistakes and past, ended relationships with regret. Rather look at them and use them to help you grow into a better person. Easier said than done, I know. When I look at my relationships that have failed because of me, I highlight the places where I can work on to be a better person moving forward. Because if I don't, I would be the villain over and over again. It would only add negative, regretful chapters in my book. Instead, I look at my toxic choices from my past and use those moments to better me so I don't continue an unhealthy cycle. Don't get me wrong - it's not easy. It takes practice, sucking up your pride, and humbling yourself which, at times, is not my cup of tea (just ask any of my exes). But it's worth it. Growth is worth it. You're worth it.

Every single chapter in your life counts. The bad. The good. The worse. And the better. They all matter. If we only focus on the good - you'll only be good. But if we use the bad to highlight what we want to be and what we want to change, we'll be better. If all I heard was compliments and I never received constructive feedback, I wouldn't grow. None of us would. We'd stay the same throughout our book and who would really want to read a novel where the character doesn't change for the better? Not me. It would frustrate me to keep reading about a character who continues to be toxic and doesn't acknowledge it and try to be better.

You owe it to yourself to look in the mirror and be better. But remember: Growth not perfection. It's okay to make mistakes and it's okay to realize that you've been the villain. What's not okay is not owning up to it and not being accountable for your actions. No one wants to hear, "I'm sorry", followed by the action that they just apologized for. I think part of being accountable is making a change following the apology and trying to be consistent with the change.

So who are you today: bad wolf? good wolf? Ignoring all the growth or accepting the lessons and learning to be a better person?

Challenge yourself to look at the roles you played and are playing in your relationships. How can be you be better?

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Featured

15 Mind-Bending Riddles

Hopefully they will make you laugh.

180575
 Ilistrated image of the planet and images of questions
StableDiffusion

I've been super busy lately with school work, studying, etc. Besides the fact that I do nothing but AP chemistry and AP economics, I constantly think of stupid questions that are almost impossible to answer. So, maybe you could answer them for me, and if not then we can both wonder what the answers to these 15 questions could be.

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

Most Epic Aurora Borealis Photos: October 2024

As if May wasn't enough, a truly spectacular Northern Lights show lit up the sky on Oct. 10, 2024

7559
stunning aurora borealis display over a forest of trees and lake
StableDiffusion

From sea to shining sea, the United States was uniquely positioned for an incredible Aurora Borealis display on Thursday, Oct. 10, 2024, going into Friday, Oct. 11.

It was the second time this year after an historic geomagnetic storm in May 2024. Those Northern Lights were visible in Europe and North America, just like this latest rendition.

Keep Reading...Show less
 silhouette of a woman on the beach at sunrise
StableDiffusion

Content warning: This article contains descriptions of suicide/suicidal thoughts.

When you are feeling down, please know that there are many reasons to keep living.

Keep Reading...Show less
Relationships

Power of Love Letters

I don't think I say it enough...

452727
Illistrated image of a letter with 2 red hearts
StableDiffusion

To My Loving Boyfriend,

  • Thank you for all that you do for me
  • Thank you for working through disagreements with me
  • Thank you for always supporting me
  • I appreciate you more than words can express
  • You have helped me grow and become a better person
  • I can't wait to see where life takes us next
  • I promise to cherish every moment with you
  • Thank you for being my best friend and confidante
  • I love you and everything you do

To start off, here's something I don't say nearly enough: thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart. You do so much for me that I can't even put into words how much I appreciate everything you do - and have done - for me over the course of our relationship so far. While every couple has their fair share of tiffs and disagreements, thank you for getting through all of them with me and making us a better couple at the other end. With any argument, we don't just throw in the towel and say we're done, but we work towards a solution that puts us in a greater place each day. Thank you for always working with me and never giving up on us.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

11 Signs You Grew Up In Hauppauge, NY

Because no one ever really leaves.

23431
Map of Hauppauge, New York
Google

Ah, yes, good old Hauppauge. We are that town in the dead center of Long Island that barely anyone knows how to pronounce unless they're from the town itself or live in a nearby area. Hauppauge is home to people of all kinds. We always have new families joining the community but honestly, the majority of the town is filled with people who never leave (high school alumni) and elders who have raised their kids here. Around the town, there are some just some landmarks and places that only the people of Hauppauge will ever understand the importance or even the annoyance of.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments