8 Weird Things You Probably Experienced If You Grew Up In A Christian Home | The Odyssey Online
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8 Weird Things You Probably Experienced If You Grew Up In A Christian Home

Jesus is dope, but the Church can be confusing.

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8 Weird Things You Probably Experienced If You Grew Up In A Christian Home
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So I grew up in a Christian home. For the most part I enjoyed my time in the church, but there were some weird things that go along with being a church kid. Here are some things you might have experienced as a church kid, too:

1. Youth groups

Youth groups were kinda awkward. It's a bunch of smelly middle schoolers stuck in a small room trying to grasp concepts that were flyin' at cha. Then on top of that, there were small groups that included a bunch of middle school girls trying to put their good faces on, but still gossiping. Ya, weird times.

2. Church lock-ins

Again, awkward middle school kids, but this time they're hopped up on sugar and told to stay up all night. BAD IDEA YOUTH GROUPS! On top of that they try to have bible study time in the middle of kids hitting each other with pool noodles.

3. The whole Blood and Body of Christ thing

Um... kind of a hard concept to grasp when you're a kid. No it's not actually flesh and blood, it's symbolism, but like let's make this clear, please. We aren't a bunch of Jeffrey Dohmers.

4. Not being allowed to read or watch certain things, because it's the Devil:

One time my mom told me I couldn't collect Pokemon cards (don't worry now she's super chill about me collecting Pokemon cards), because it involved magic. I knew so many kids in church who couldn't read Harry Potter or watch particular movies because it involved witchcraft. So, HP isn't allowed, but Bible Man is? Bible Man was scary as shit sometimes.

5. Being exposed to some political things way too early

When I was in middle school I participated in a pro-life protest in school. While I admire little Mekahla for standing up for something she believed in-I'm still the same way soo..- maybe baby M didn't fully understand the nuances of this political issue.

I was exposed to some really big things, abortion, homosexuality, and sexuality when I was way too young to get my stance. Not a knock on my dope parents, more of a wait why are we telling kids how to view these tough topics in the church?

6. Christian Music/Music Festival

"What would people think..." if you can finish that quote you are a church kid! Awww Christian music, so nostalgic, yet sometimes horrible. That's not to say there aren't good Christian bands out there, but for every Relient K, there's a Skillet. Then on top of this sometimes questionable music, there are festivals that bring all of it in one place! When my family went to those super Christian festivals we spent most of our time in the Hardcore section of the festival. We started going to a great Christian music festival called Cornerstone, RIP.



7. Jesus T’s

Awwww Dew Jesus shirts. I feel like if Jesus saw that he would be straight flipping tables Matthew 21 style. First of all why you trynna make money off of Jesus, second why you makin him look like a nerd! That being said my brother bought this sweet sweatshirt and I love wearing it.


8. Christian Programming

I know I already brought him up, but um Bible Man was super scary! It was like the Christian version of Power Rangers, but somehow the hero looked more terrifying than the monsters he fought.

Then on top of that you see the actor who plays Bible Man drunk on TV. This is so confusing!!! Also most Christian entertainment is iffy to say the least. Do not get me started on Kirk Cameron films. Something we can all agree on though, Veggie Tales is hella legit.


Even though growing up in the church can be challenging or awkward, it does lay a wonderful foundation for the future. Eventually you figure out what things to take seriously and what things Jesus is super chill about. Being a Christian is fun, and Jesus is pretty dope too.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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