What do you see when you look in a mirror? Is it the fat around your belly or the smile on your face? Did you know that about 91 percent of woman are unhappy with their body image and only five percent can naturally possess their ideal body shape? Your body is a sacred temple, one of a kind, ever changing and unique in its own way. You are a being made like no other. A limited edition series that starts and ends with you. Yet it is so common to stop in front of a mirror and criticize the smallest imperfection in your body.
I have struggled with my body image for numerous years. Ever since I was a child, I noticed that I was not like the kids around me. I was taller and heavier than anyone around me. This discomfort allowed me to create a strong relationship with food. When I was happy, I ate; when I was depressed, I ate; even when I was indifferent, I continued to eat. Eating was my rebellion to all the comments I received in school. Little did I know that this relationship was killing me inside. By thirteen, I already had cholesterol and blood pressure complications.
This health issue scared the crap out of me. I didn’t want to be that kid that died by 16 because he was addicted to food. My immediate reaction was to stop eating all together. I became infatuated with calorie constriction. I went from eating 2,500 calories to 2,000, then to 1,000, and finally, I reached my minimum of 800 calories. Combined with all my clubs in school and cross country, I was literary drying up. Within three months, I had lost over 60 pounds. Towards the end of the diet, I knew I couldn’t maintain this lifestyle. I was always lightheaded and clumsy. This worried my parents to the extent that I needed to see a doctor, who declared me anorexic. Sure enough, after I started consuming more food again, I gained more than 40 pounds.
Today, I stand at 250 pounds. Sure, it is not where I would like to be, but I now know that there are healthier ways to lose weight. Most importantly, I changed my relationship with food: instead of having an addiction and fearing it, I learned how to appreciate its effects. This is my change for a better tomorrow.
