Welcome to the Midwest, where the weather's made up and the forecast doesn't matter.

In fact, I've got a forecast for you based off our weather from the past few weeks. (Disclaimer: it's not a REAL forecast. DO NOT plan your week by this.)

Monday

32 and snow.

Yes, this weekend was warm or at least decent, yes there's a chance of snow now. Do you have a problem with that? Did you put your winter coat away? That was stupid, why did you do that? BUST THAT COAT BACK OUT. I KNOW it's March, Mother Nature don't care.

Tuesday

53 and sunny.

So... shorts? Jeans? Light jacket? Double sweatshirt? Am I going to have to go outside quick to see how warm it actually is? Is there a difference in warmth if I'm in the sun or shade? I JUST DON'T KNOW.

Wednesday

65 and PERFECT.

SHORTS. SALMON SHORTS EVERYWHERE.

SUNNY WITH A CHANCE OF SKIPPING CLASS TO ENJOY THIS WEATHER ITS GORGEOUS. All the the frat boys or wannabe frat boys have broken out the salmon shorts or peach shorts or whatever colorful shorts they own. Some guys have even gone as far as breaking out the bro tanks- they're a little TOO excited. People are going home to slip out onto their rooftops to day drink. #College

*Literally sees everyone on campus riding longboards, blading, slacklining, hammock-ing, playing frisbee, etc.*

Thursday

40 and cloudy and windy AF.

What happened? But seriously? It's cloudy, it's windy (when isn't it?). I'm being blown off the sidewalk BY. THE. WIND. I want what Wednesday's weather was, when's that coming back?

Friday

70 and raining.

IT GON RAIN.

Aw score! 70 degrees! *double take* EXCUSE ME? RAIN?

*exasperated sigh as I quote Waka Flocka Flame* "Rain rain go away that's what all my haters say."

Saturday

44 and cloudy.

I didn't want to have fun this weekend anyway. I don't have time to have fun in nice weather on the weekend because college. I'll just curl up and do homework I guess. Or watch movies.

Sunday

50 and partly sunny.

Sure, on the Lord's day the weather is decent. I have to get to church somehow. Even though it's a bit brisk. But I'll take 50 and partly sunny over wind gusts of a hundred and overcast.

Welcome to the weather. Best of luck figuring it out.