Water

I'm walking on an ocean I cannot submerge myself in

I walk on the still, peaceful water

Wondering why it won't accept me

I touch my hand to the surface and it is hard like ice

I watch the smiling faces underneath the water

They're laughing. They're happy.

In the distance a wave emerges and heads towards me

I fall victim to its roaring rage

It spins me until I stop fighting

I let the water fill my lungs and it burns

When I open my eyes I am with the smiling faces

But I'm not laughing. I'm not happy.

But I'm not sad.

Sometimes the wave comes back

It rips me from my emptiness and I fall victim to it's roaring rage

It spins me until I stop fighting

I let the water fill my lungs and it burns

When I open my eyes I am walking on the water

Wondering why it won't accept me

And I beg to drown