Charlie sat in the booth, watching the small can light that hung above the table swing gently in a slowly closing circle. The waitress had bumped it with her head when she came by to pour her more coffee and it was thrown into an imaginary orbit only to creep back into a still hang over the array of typical American diner table-toppers. There was an assortment of sweeteners that formed a rainbow of colors, a napkin dispenser, and a pair of salt and pepper shakers all sorted neatly on the end of the table closest to the window. Charlie looked down at her cup of coffee, watching the steam climb from the mug and into the air. She was not one for sugar or creamer, but still had a stirring spoon easily rounding the inside of the cup. It was something to do while she waited for Jack to arrive. She watched the waitress go from table to table, obviously tired at this time of night, and began to wonder if she would have to start working in a place like this.
At least she knew that Jack was coming. He texted her about ten minutes ago saying that he was filling up his gas tank and that he would arrive in about ten minutes. She figured that she would wait more along the lines of twenty or even thirty minutes; it was pouring rain outside and Jack was consistently late to nearly everything he did.
Charlie had come to hate Jack. She hadn't hated him about a month ago when they were together, but she had been a fool in love and only in hindsight was able to recognize how seriously love blinds. He was tall and handsome with a noble face but proved to be just another jerk who loved to use girls, twisting his way into their hearts wearing an innocent smile and telling a victim's story. As a child, Charlie's father always told her that boys were like magicians and that you shouldn't listen to them if you wanted to spot their trick. He believed that if you watched their hands, you could catch them in the act of trying to fool you because that's where they almost always came from. She was the sucker who had forgotten to stop listening and keep an eye out for the tricks.
Charlie found Jack with another girl the night before her birthday. His front door was unlocked, so she knocked twice and walked into his apartment. She was wearing his favorite outfit and looked wonderful. Her sweater was his favorite shade of green and her shorts were white denim cutoffs that turned heads wherever she wore them. She almost never had the confidence to put them on, even though she was a naturally beautiful girl. She had a stunning figure and was blessed with flawless skin, never needing to dawn an ounce of makeup. Her blonde hair was cut neatly short but nearly long enough to touch her shoulders, complimenting the soft features of the face like a frame around a painting. She was what Jack's friends referred to as a "knockout," but didn't feel that way about herself.
She had come into the apartment carrying groceries, ready to make a surprise dinner for the two of them. She had been practicing making homemade pizzas since the first semester and was ready for a romantic evening of throwing dough and singing along to Billy Joel when she heard him with someone in the bedroom. As soon as the sounds reached her ears, she dropped everything she was holding and ran back to her dorm. She then realized she couldn't get in the door, having left her R2D2 keyring on the kitchen table in the rush.
Jack texted her later, not apologizing, but letting her know that he had her keys, which were sitting on the kitchen counter.
She had recovered gradually since their breakup, but it was her freshman year and she felt that she had the right to be upset. Even though they had only been together for only two months, it had been her first serious relationship and Jack moved things forward much too quickly. He took advantage of her early on, and no matter how many times she tried to stop him, he kept making moves until she felt that she couldn't say no. She knew that she wanted him just as much as he wanted her, but she was afraid. Eventually, she gave in and became completely infatuated. He began to change, having gotten what he wanted, and she could only watch as his personality fell away and left a shell of the person she had come to love. She tried to keep what they had alive but knew that she couldn't. She only stayed in the relationship in hopes that the Jack she had watched fade away would resurface, but he didn't, and she learned later that the girl he slept with had been Sarah, her lab partner, and confidant.
It was as much a relief to Charlie as it was painful when she realized it was over. She went back to his apartment, shaking with nerves, only to find it still unlocked. Neither he or any of his roommates were home when she walked in, quickly finding her keys on the counter where Jack had left them. She hadn't felt so alone in her entire life as the moment she realized he wasn't going to say goodbye, until two days ago, after she took the first pregnancy test.
She concluded that the result was impossible. She knew the test was obviously a dud and that there was no way God would put her in such a situation. Not a kind, beautiful, church-going girl such as herself. The vomiting and dizziness had to have been from some other sickness, and the positive test was just incorrect. She knew that she was not pregnant.
Yet, from some deep corner of her heart, she knew that she was.
She went to the clinic the next day to speak a specialist, who drew blood and confirmed the results of the original test. The hot feeling of fear she felt from deep within before poured over her like molten metal. She didn't know how to respond, who to call, or what to say. She was locked in her mind, unable to conjure any words to say, but watched on as her imagination picked her future apart and replaced it with a reality she knew she wasn't able to face. The doctor was calling her name, telling her there were plenty of options, handing her brochures, but she wasn't listening. She only began to hear when he told her to schedule another appointment with the university's hospital, and she realized that she had twenty-two dollars to her name and a parking ticket for forty. She began to cry, not out of fear for herself but for her family, her friends, her future, and her child. How would everyone react? What would they think of her? How could she pull together the strength to tell her friends, never mind her Dad? Her brain took her back to the conclusion that this couldn't be happening and that it was some sort of twisted nightmare, but as she walked away from the hospital, she knew there wasn't anything more distant from the truth. She didn't know what to do, so she just continued walking.
It was only after walking for fifteen blocks, thoughts flying through her mind like Formula One race cars, when she realized that she needed to talk to Jack.
