I'm so tired of waking up sad.

Waking up and thinking "this is my reality" where a nightmare seems more appealing,

waking up with a lump already formed in your throat, it feels like a pebble lodged that stifles complaint and need because sticks and stones may break my bones but admitting the pain could potentially break me.

I retreat into myself like a general calling back his troops because this a battle I know I cannot win

because I've been charging into wars alone,

because I've learned that drafting others into wars that end in defeat leaves your fellow soldiers in early graves,

because their hope outweighs your knowledge from experience,

and sometimes that burden alone is too heavy to bear.