In the hopes of getting married someday, we all have some flaws that we should be warning our significant others about.
I mean, nobody’s perfect.
Here’s to you, my future lover. (Cue the clinking wine glasses.) Good luck – Ha!
To my future husband,
Someday you might ask yourself, “Why did I marry such a weird human being?” I know this is going to happen because I tend to break out in random song all too often. My favorite songs to scream at the top of my lungs are “Soak Up The Sun” and “Let’s Hear It For The Boy.” Therefore, you might want to refrain from putting these hits on cue.
Another reason you might be questioning our marriage is the highly inappropriate jokes that I tend to make on the regular. This might be a result of living in close quarters with six of my best friends, but the “your mom” jokes will slip out all too often. However, I will know you are the one if you find these jokes just as funny as I do.
Not only am I weird, but I have certain requests that you might need to know before you put a ring on it.
To start, my number one request is that I MUST be the big spoon each and every time we cuddle. I know that your role as my husband is to be the big spoon, but that is far too normal for my liking. There is something about being the cuddler rather than being cuddled that makes me very happy.
Secondly, ranch deserves its own food group. Don’t take it personally if I drown your deliciously homemade meal in ranch. It’s not you, it’s me. (I truly think I have an addiction.)
Another important thing you should know about me is that I have a weird obsession with Harry Styles. It is so absurd that if he asked me to leave you for him, there is good chance that I will be packing my bags in a matter of minutes. However, the likelihood of this happening is very slim (it took me a while to actually admit this). But I figured you should be warned, just in case.
There will also come a point when you are expected to meet my family, and you will soon realize just how crazy they are, too. However, they are some of the most important people in my life and I am hoping they will quickly become some of yours, too. Just beware of my little brother’s sneaky tricks. Don’t let him fool you.
All in all, although I have some quirks, and I know you will have them too, I hope you find a way to love me in my entirety. You just need a little warning in advance to get used to them.
Sincerely,
Your Uniquely Crazy Future Wife
