It's February and the world of mass-produced candy, cheaply stitched stuffed animals, and over-the-top flower arrangements is all abuzz in preparation for the most exciting time of the year: Valentine's Day.
To make the buzz even louder, your significant other has casually reminded you of their wish list by sending links to flashy jewelry, rich red-and-pink flower bouquets, and heart-shaped boxes big enough to give a full-grown elephant a cavity. It's next to impossible to forget about the holiday.
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But what about those of us who aren't currently in a relationship? Don't worry, we're well aware that it's that special day for love and have an overwhelming desire to punch those gaudy giant teddy bears square in the kisser every time we see one dangling an arm from the endcap at the store.
However, there's no need to avoid your local Walmart this year. While the store is still stocking everything heart-shaped from skillet brownies to Oreo Dunking Kits, they're considering every romantic possibility out there.
If your love life is on pause or nonexistent in 2020, the folks at Walmart have got your back with the Sam's Choice Heartbreaker chocolate bark.
While most barks are already broken into pieces, this glorious slab of chocolate comes with the special addition of a wooden hammer so you can let Valentine's Day know how you really feel.
Mad at your ex? Heartbroken over your recent breakup? Upset that you're alone for yet another holiday? Just not feeling the love this year?
Head to your local Walmart so you can celebrate love by getting rid of some toxic energy and enjoy chocolate in one go.
Plow through the syrupy mush of the items targeting lovebirds, pick up one of these bad boys, and take out all of your frustration on that sprinkle-infested hunk of velvety chocolate.
The bars are made of solid milk chocolate and are decorated with pink, purple, and white sprinkles before they are nestled into heart-shaped boxes, the mallet resting snugly on top.
One tin will set you back about $12 and will require a trip down the seasonal candy aisle, but the promise of releasing your frustration will make it all worth it in the end.
So if you find yourself alone (and maybe even a little bitter) this Valentine's Day, just take a trip to everyone's local supermarket because Walmart is ALWAYSthere for you.
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