The effects of emotional pain seem endless: stomach ache, throbbing headache, cheeks stained with tear tracks, raised heart rate, sadness or depression, a brain full of replays and painful memories, a thought that physical pain would be better than the emotional hurt, etc.

"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me." We have all heard that phrase, and it's amazing to think we were once so young and hopeful to actually believe that words wouldn't hurt us. When words seem like they can almost hurt more than physical pain, emotional abuse is just as serious as physical abuse.

Aside from actually going through the process of emotional pain, the worst part is the hurt in your heart and the thoughts running through your mind. The best part of going through the pain is learning about who you are, who you want to be and who you don't want to be. The experience itself is painful. But the learning that comes with the experience is the best worst part of the situation, even if it's hard to see at first

I would consider myself to be an observant person, and after 21-years, I have taken mental notes of the way people act or treat others. Ever since I was a teen, I feared I would lose the person I was, or become some of the people I have observed.

A vow is defined as a solemn promise, and today, in an effort to hold my values close to me, I am making a vow to myself of the kind of person I will and will not be.

I vow to not abuse anyone with my words or yell out of rage and anger. I will not manipulate anyone or purposely play games. I will communicate effectively (effectively being the key word.) I will listen. I will not dwell on the past or talk in circles. I vow to be honest about my feelings and put the feelings of others first. I will not be a hypocrite. I will not be walked over, but I won't be stubborn. I will remember to speak in kindness and never out of frustration. I will remember the words that I speak can leave an emotional scar on another person. I vow to never forget the strength I've been blessed with. I will remember that I am not weak. I will not allow my heart to believe the hurtful words said about me. I will remember people make mistakes and no one will ever be perfect. I vow to never think twice about the value of my life. I will allow each painful memory a teeny tiny place in my mind, but never in my heart. Ultimately, I will trust God, his plan and his power to get me through each wave of my life.

And if I ever forget these things, I will engrave the words from this post into my mind. If I ever I become the person I swore I wouldn’t be, I will stop to remember these vows.