A beacon. A promise. A hero fresh from the fight. Leslie Knope is all of this and more. And the best part is: she could be your next president! Her hometown of Pawnee, Indiana, rose from the ashes on account of Leslie’s diligent and passionate efforts to transform it from trashy to classy. Literally, she turned a trash-filled pit into a classy park for city-wide events. Now it’s America’s turn!
What can Leslie do for our country?
1. Say goodbye to the Bald Eagle – Lil’ Sebastian will be our new national mascot!
2. Free waffles will be declared a natural human right. Also, Leslie plans on endorsing JJ’s Diner to become a national restaurant chain.
3. Speaking of natural human rights, Leslie supports the legality of self-defense.
4. Leslie has a bottomless pit of dedication to you, her citizens. You will always come first in her agendas.
5. Leslie’s passion for and acceptance of the LGBT community will allow them to take great strides in our society.
6. Women everywhere will be encouraged to become “beautiful, talented, brilliant, powerful musk” oxen, as well as “poetic, noble land mermaid(s).” Also, “Gal-entine’s Day” will be declared a national holiday.
7. Leslie’s literal can of whoop a** will take America all the way if we should engage in aggressive foreign policy.
8. Liz Lemon will be Leslie’s Vice President.
Who needs a wall when you can have all of the above? You are welcome America. So treat yo' self to a glorious future and vote for Leslie Knope in your 2016 presidential election!
