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The Vision I Thought I Knew

When the vision does not always match reality.

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This is a response to "Everyone Should Have an Inspiration Board".

The vision I thought I knew. A self-constructed elixer of the mind that has us dreaming in a way that brings us light and hope for better things to come. Visions offer something for us to reach for and challenge us about our present. A vision can be rockingly eye-opening and a self-dive into our swirling present all at once.

Since I was little, I had what people deemed as "visions" for getting older. Frozen in time, I dreamed of things that made the most sense that I could grasp for my future. For example, my friend group cheering me on in my wedding thinking they would not change and forever stay the same when I was 20. The vision I dreamed would contain aspects of my current state. Certain friends would undoubtedly be in my wedding never thinking they would eventually exit my life. To me, that is where the vision is faulty. A vision offers a slight glimpse to what things could be or how we want our lifestyle to endure based on the present state we are in now. It is like a mirror reflecting off another mirror. The present is the original mirror. We see it clearly and know exactly what is going on when we look into the mirror. Once the mirror is reflected into another mirror, the next view of us is a little blurry and distant. I view visions like that. We smile into the mirror creating an expression we solely know, but how could we truly tell we are smiling with the extensions of infinite mirrors? We look into the future to try and create a vision when there are so many distortions that can happen from now until then.

As of now, most of the visions I dreamed for myself at the age of 10, 15, and even 20, panned out much differently than what I expected.

At 10, my vision for the future was to have lots of friends, the cutest clothes from Limited Too, seeing both sets of grandparents at least a couple times a year, getting a drivable, pink jeep for Christmas, secretly hoping the boy who sat next to me in second grade had a crush on me too and having the coolest room with the coolest posters. I dreamed to have my ears pierced, a phone, and to wear tube tops. I wanted to be the best basketball player and rough it up with the boys on the court at recess. I wanted to be loved by my teachers and envisioned myself being the teachers favorite. I never wanted be in trouble and always had to prove I was smarter than the kid next to me even though that was not always true. These are just some of the visions I had for myself at that time. Looking back they were all appropriate and made sense even if they seemed foolish in ways. For what I knew at the time, my experiences allowed me to only think so far into what life was in that moment. This would be my vision board at 10.

At 15, my vision was about being accepted more than anything. A heightened time of anxiety, awkwardness, and realization of the future opened my eyes. I wanted nothing more than to be popular and accepted. I dreamed of the days where I would have a car, a boyfriend, see high-school football games, still wear the cutest clothes and dreamt of the day I could stand there with all my friends taking prom pictures. Throw in getting braces taken off and it all sounded like a dream. This would be my vision board at 15.

At 20, my vision board included not having a curfew, being financially stable to be able to go do things on my own, a great internship, the college dream of being in a sorority, meeting my soul-mate, owning my own place, traveling, getting married in my mid- twenties, and eventually settling down somewhere. This would be my vision board at 20.

The visions I have had throughout my lifetime have all had a time and place. A lot of them make sense and I am thankful for all my stepping stones that have gotten me to where I am now. A lot of the once dreamy visions I knew did not shape out to be how things are currently but that is okay. A lot has happened since then and my vision board would look a little different, as it would 15 years from now.

Having visions for the future is a wonderful thing, but fair warning, things might not always turn out how they appear as you look into the reflective mirror. Distortions may occur. But some would just say that is the beauty of life.

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