I am going abroad this semester and will genuinely miss being in the middle of nowhere Virginia. There's something really awesome about driving 7 hours, passing roughly as many cows as I do Jesus crosses religious symbols and somehow hitting a town which I am #blessed to call my home. I am definitely going to be that person that returns in August wearing a beret to show everyone I went abroad and people will be like, "Why are you wearing a beret, you went to Florence?" to them — I would show them that there is a small patch of leather in my beret, making it more Florence-like and ultimately acceptable.
There's, of course, a lot I will miss, but for starters here are my top 15 things I will miss about being at Virginia Tech.
1. Getting a good container of strawberries from Turner Grab & Go
It is easier to find an eligible Jewish husband at Virginia Tech than it is to find these — and that says A LOT.
2. Running to a bathroom from across campus to see that it is 'closed for cleaning'
I am mad if it is closed and I am mad if it's dirty. Women, they're so hard to please!
3. Going into the fourth-floor elevator in a hurry only for it to go up and then go back down to the level I was just on forcing me to see everyone I thought I just beat out
4. Dropping an entire bottle of rosé the first day and my room reeking
I feel like some people are like "ahhh, I love the smell of rosé!" And to that I would say, do you? Like when you are trying to fall asleep? Because shut up, you don't know what I've been through.
5. Being the sniffler in Torg Bridge. Fuck that person.
6. Aimlessly looking for my friends on the 4th floor and needing them to send me a picture of exactly where they are sitting because I am difficult like that
7. Eating Farm and Fields at Owens and thinking I am a literal health goddess
News flash: Just because my grilled cheese is 'locally grown' does not mean it isn't a shit ton of cheese on a fat loaf of bread sprayed with grease
8. Ordering a protein berry workout smoothie from Jamba Juice with little to no plan of actually working out
It's all about the illusion.
9. Having the Breugger's line be only to the stools
Everything bagel cream cheese lox and capers plzzzz
10. Sitting in a Torg lecture only to realize that everyone is on their laptop on facebook/watching porn/on Twitter
Yeah, I still hand write my notes and do worse than the people on their laptops. I just need to step up my twitter game.
11. Having someone force a tiny baby Bible in my hand five times in one day and each time me responding "I am Jewish, no thanks"
If this was the other way around and it was a jew handing shit out and someone responded with "I am Christian no thanks" it would be a totally different story. Just saying. Perspective.
12. Finding a table at ABP
I feel like a hunter stalking its prey (I included this for all of my Virginia friends- they LOVE to wear camo and hunt!)
13. Walking into a classroom that isn't my own... 11 weeks into the semester
14. RUNNING to the HXP @ Litton Reeves from McComas only for it to drive away and have my peers stare at me like I am a peasant as it drives away
Not false. And to the bus driver — you saw me? Stop being fake. Just because the bus is 'fare free' doesn't give you the right to make a fool of people.